Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

The difference between feeling confident and being confident… or how you put your life in the hands of a liar

It’s Christmas Eve. Strong Southern wind… unusual noises… and bouts of wanting to weep. WTF? There is nothing wrong with my life, I am not connected to anyone in particular, and yet.

I muscletest if it is the Dark Side emotion transmission, and yes, it is…

Feelings come from who knows where, and yet, YOU are basing all your decisions on feelings. How utterly misguided is that?

If the feeling were: you can do it, you’d jump into an empty pool and break your neck… you and your teenagers have done that driving too fast… haven’t you? Or trying drugs saying: I am stronger than that… and get hooked. Or “one won’t hurt” of potato chips… and end up eating the whole bag.

Feelings are unreliable guidance… the source of feelings is not you, not something that even knows about you… it is outside of you.

Many of you are waiting to feel confident to do anything requiring action. Or waiting for the fear to go away…
Continue reading “The difference between feeling confident and being confident… or how you put your life in the hands of a liar”

More on why you can’t succeed alone: process, followup

I just realized something: following an already established process, going step by step, is a whole different capacity than creating one.

I am weak at both, but I am literally unwilling to spend my limited energies to create a process.

The resistance is so strong, my neck and shoulders are hurting.

What is that about?

There are a lot of ways to analyze humans and their behaviors, and one of them is through conation, which is a, I guess, Latin word for inclination, or inner nature.

Kathy Kolbe created a few tests and she says that the amount of initiative, the amount of energy to start something is finite, and everyone’s can be divided to 20… so far so good, I hope.

The four drastically different ways to approach something, to initiate something are
Continue reading “More on why you can’t succeed alone: process, followup”

Your feelings are lying to you… or why to have a coach

Your feelings are lying to you

Your fear says: don’t do anything… Or it may say: run… and you run.

When you look at all the people you know, the ones that listen to their feelings are mediocre at best, No winners among them.

Because winning requires you to stay in the game, regardless of your feelings.

I say: you are stupid, a lot. What do I mean? Hey, stupid as the stupid does.

Do you know how many opportunities Bill Gates had to say: Nah, too hard! or Nah, they don’t want it. or Nah, I am too afraid.
Continue reading “Your feelings are lying to you… or why to have a coach”

What are skills? I bet you have no clue…

What are skills?

I bet you have no clue… or you would be building them…

Don’t feel stupid, 99% of all people have no idea what skills are. This is one of the secrets that make people stuck in the dead end job they are in… not knowing what skills are, and not knowing what their skills are.

Skills are abilities, true and tried abilities you have used and used them well enough to succeed.

Skill means: you can do something. well enough.

Driving is a skill. Cooking is a skill, Shopping for groceries is a skill. Continue reading “What are skills? I bet you have no clue…”

What is the button I could push that would make you do what you need to do to grow?

Today was my errands day. It is also the only day during the week when I talk to anyone.

And as you know, talking when I have echo, someone who hears me is the most meaningful activity for me.

I did have private clients for massage, and I did it for 16 years… Giving a massage is not meaningful for me. So I picked and chose, and filtered, and screened the people that wanted a massage: If I didn’t feel that there will be a meaningful conversation, that I would be heard, I didn’t take them as a client.

Hey, it’s my life, and my fulfillment is what it is supposed to be organized around.

I am unabashed that what is important to me is the most important thing for me, bar none.

So being more influential, hearing more echo from you is always on my mind, because it is not working. Not working for me.
Continue reading “What is the button I could push that would make you do what you need to do to grow?”

There is no secret to raising your vibration

There is no secret, no secret ingredient to raising your vibration, to become an expanding human being.

For those of you who have been making ever tightening circles around the secret, you may call it the Truth, this article will be first a big let-down. A disappointment. Continue reading “There is no secret to raising your vibration”

How, what you don’t know that you don’t know, is biting you… and you can’t see what bit you without help

If I asked you what it is that you don’t know that you don’t know… no matter how long you looked, you would not see anything, because it is either that you don’t know or the question is stupid.

But everything that is missing for you to know is in that: what you don’t know that you don’t know.

The question is: is there a way to see what you don’t know that you don’t know? The answer is: yes… other people’s blind spots are different from yours.

And then some people specialize in that area…

Malcolm Gladwell is the guy who you want to look at for many of the “We didn’t know that we didn’t know” cultural blind spots.
Continue reading “How, what you don’t know that you don’t know, is biting you… and you can’t see what bit you without help”

What else you need to know about the capacity: flexibility?

What else do you need to know about the capacity: flexibility?

In a recent article I pit reed-mode against oak-mode.

I call one flexible and the other inflexible or stuck.

But there is more to it.

Reed

Reed can be blown in any direction, and it doesn’t resist
Reed will return to its neutral state once the wind stops blowing. It knows what it is, and it returns there. It’s a natural state of growth, happiness and peace.

Sometimes you think you are a reed, because you are blown, in one direction: misery. But you are mistaken.
Continue reading “What else you need to know about the capacity: flexibility?”

The process of going from hopeless to energized and in action: limbering up, becoming flexible

About 50% of mornings I wake up depressed, hopeless, and regretting that I woke up at all.

Why would that be? Because my view of my life is stuck in a particular vantage point, you could call negative.

And those mornings, with the exception of a few, I look around for ways to unstuck myself. Not because I believe I can… but because I learned to do that.

This morning I read the Monday Morning Memo… and was inspired to write my own based on the same general idea.

I had no idea that I can do it, I had no idea if it would take me anywhere: I had the flexibility to do it.

Did I know it was going to unstuck me? Not really. And it did…

Something similar I do every morning. Sometimes I have to do it over and over and over, sometimes I get swept away by the joy of expressing myself…

And rarely, nowadays, I indulge my hopelessness for a day or two.
Continue reading “The process of going from hopeless to energized and in action: limbering up, becoming flexible”

Meaningful life is what you want? Let’s see how you can get that…

People who have meaningful work, want to work more… they work willingly, study willingly, grow willingly. ¹

What could you do to steal meaning into your life? So you can have a meaningful life?

The new year is coming. It is customary to make inventory, and to set direction for the new year around this time of the year… even though you are busy planning for Christmas.

Christmas is the right time… With your Observer, with your Witness, watch your level of abundance, your level of grace and ease, your level of love with the people whom you profess to love.

What people want the most is a meaningful life. A life that makes sense, on a moment to moment way, where it is worth doing what you are doing because the direction it is taking you is worth going.

Life is full of transactions.

Lots of transactions on any given day.

A meaningful life is full of meaningful transactions.
Continue reading “Meaningful life is what you want? Let’s see how you can get that…”