Why Knowing Yourself Is The Foundation Of Personal Growth

Originally posted 2011-05-20 13:15:08.

Why Knowing Yourself Is The Foundation Of Personal Growth

Know thyself… said the Greeks, and I can’t agree more.

Unless you are clear about where you are, what are your limitations, what are your inner pulls (conation), your results in life will be puny, in every area of life.

Know Thyself If men would search diligently their own minds, and examine minutely their thoughts and actions, they would be more cautious in censuring the conduct of others, as they would find in themselves abundantly sufficient cause for reproof. “It is a good horse that never stumbles;” and lie is a good man indeed who cannot reproach himself with numerous slips and errors.” “Every bean has its black,” and every man his follies and vices.

The adage also teaches us to set a proper value upon ourselves, and to be careful not to do anything that may degrade us. It is not known to whom we are indebted for this golden rule; we only learn that it is of very long standing, and was held in such high estimation by the ancients, that it was placed over the doors of their temples, and it was also supposed by them, that ” E coelo descen- dit,” it came down from heaven. ” ‘Man know thyself!’ tins precept from on high Came down, imagined by the Deity; Oh! be the words indelibly imprest On the live tablet of each human breast.

But how do you Know Yourself? Know yourself as others know yourself? Know about yourself? Know what psychologist made up as a category for yourself? Do the test that was devised for testing privates sent to fight in the VietNam war?

People want to know themselves to make it easier to win… to make it easier to beat bad habits. To justify why they are the way they are.

My experience (as a coach, 30 years and thousands of people), has been that you do best when you know your machine. Your machine has a bent… an inclination, and if you know it you can be successful… with any machine.

Some 30 years ago I had a car I didn’t have to lock, because only I could drive it. It would stall for everyone else. I drove it another 100 thousand miles. I got it after the previous owner gave up on it. It had 160 thousand miles on it.

The knowledge: know yourself, here, with that car, applied to the car and myself, together. The car was seriously flawed… but no one could have guessed from the outside, when I drove it.

I have dyslexia, serious, but I read one or two books every week. I also write for a living.

I had two major episodes of brain damage: you wouldn’t know it. I know how to drive my machine.

My soul correction is arrogance and condescension. It’s taken me longer to drive my life with these horrible afflictions, but knowing it made it possible.

When you know all the quirks of your machine, when you know what is your unscratchable itch, when you know what the machine will do unless you compensate for it, you can take your machine anywhere, any heights, any distance, any achievement.

As you work to grow in different areas in you life, it is important to really know yourself. The concept of not knowing yourself may sound preposterous to some people, but hear me out. Because we live such hectic lives, it is important to take time to become reacquainted with ourselves. It is very easy to get so focused on living life that we lose ourselves in the hustle and the bustle. With every phase in life, we change and evolve, and if all goes as planned, we should not be the same person we were five years ago. This is not to say that everything about us has to change, but it is perfectly natural and healthy to mature and grow in different areas.

Knowing yourself can help you improve your work ethic because you can really understand your limitations and know when you are pushing yourself too hard. If you are a self starter like me, you would probably work for 24 hours a day if you could. In fact, you’ve probably had to make yourself step away from your work one more than one occasion. While this self starting attitude is a good thing, it can also be a problem. If you aren’t careful, your desire for success can drive others away from you and actually ruin relationships. You may be thinking, “I thought we were supposed to be able to accomplish everything.” That is true, but sometimes you can bite of much more than you can chew, and running yourself into the ground to accomplish goals in not healthy. The beauty of accomplishing goals and achieving personal growth is discovering the balance of work and play.

While it is important to know your limits, knowing yourself helps you to know what you can’t accomplish as well as what you can accomplish. Many times, people don’t push themselves to accomplish real goals simply because thy think don’t think they’ll be successful. Once you really know yourself, you will know what you can accomplish. However, if you never try, you’ll never know how much you can truly accomplish.

When you know yourself, it is easier to keep yourself motivated. It you met someone for the first time, and they asked you to encourage them without giving you any details about their life, you would have a hard time encouraging them. By being aware of the types of things that keep you motivated, you will be less likely to reach that rock bottom point where you feel like your world is crumbling around you. It is best to constantly encourage and motivate yourself as your grow and mature.

How do you react to disappointment? What do you do when you’re sad? How often do you need to take time to truly relax? In order to maintain balance in your life, you have to constantly ask yourself these types of questions. Not only do you need to know yourself in order to have a strong foundation for personal growth, but you also have to be willing to motivate yourself when things are less than ideal.

Getting along without giving up who you are…

Getting along without giving up who you are…

getting along without giving up who you areGetting along, working along, creating side by side is very hard… often hopeless. This article points to the right way that you can learn to get along… and have harmonious relationships.

Some of my students are working on distinguishing conflict… Telling conflict apart from everything that looks like, and maybe even feels like a conflict.

For decades I pondered why the Greek sages said ‘Know Thyself‘. What difference does it make if I know myself or not.

And I wasn’t alone. Approximately 99% of humanity knows themselves to a maximum of 1%, which is as if they don’t know themselves at all.

In my Starting Point Measurements I measure this as ‘self-awareness.’

So in the absence of knowing your self, you make up a self… and that I call your ‘precious I’. Who you should be… not who you are. Continue reading “Getting along without giving up who you are…”

The bliss of being who you are, the bliss of being your Self

The bliss of being who you are, the bliss of being your Self

I wrote this article five years ago. But it goes well with my next… so I am republishing it… so they can be read together.

Last night I finished watching the British series, ‘The Paradise’ about the first department store in London.

I learned something I probably would not have been able to learn anywhere else.

The series is mainly about two characters, the owner of the store who created it. He came from nothing, and is a true entrepreneur.

The other character is a small-town girl, who works for him, and discovers herself as an entrepreneur. Discovers is the key word.
Continue reading “The bliss of being who you are, the bliss of being your Self”

Nature or nurture? Are you born a republican? a democrat?

Nature or nurture? Are you born a republican? a democrat?

Why is there such a sharp and irreconcilable difference between the right and the left in the world? The answer is in the invisible realm of reality…

There are many things I can measure in a human… while I am connected to Source. The language between Source (aka All-Knowledge, or the Zero point field) is muscletesting. It has a limited vocabulary: yes, no, and somewhat yes and somewhat no. And an occasional ‘I don’t know’ Continue reading “Nature or nurture? Are you born a republican? a democrat?”

Know Thyself is a principle… but how do you do it?

Know thyself is what is one of the 147 maxims (a short, pithy statement expressing a general truth or rule of conduct. Not the same as a principle, but there are many overlaps… Most of these maxims are virtues. My favorites are “Know what you have learned” and “Be/Know yourself”, because they are maybe the most important. Do yourself a favor, and read them, and ponder.) inscribed in Delphi… 1

In fact, it is a principle.

A principle is something to live by, something to get guidance from.

When we talk about principle driven life, any of those 147, and countless other principles will do your life justice.

When I look at people, when I observe them, their lives have no rhyme, no purpose…

Looking good is not a principle.
Wanting to be right is not a principle
I am pretty/smart/stupid is not a principle
I want to be rich is not a principle Continue reading “Know Thyself is a principle… but how do you do it?”

You want to be free… free to be yourself… but who are you? You don’t know yourself…

My first awakening, rude as it was, was in 1979. I was 32 years old, had won first prize in an architectural competition, and I was in a mental health facility as an inmate.

Depression… I was depressed…

I didn’t know I was an empath, so I have no idea how much of what I felt was mine…

One day in the big circle I said something that got me thrown out of that big circle group.

Next day I was asked to do a test: find out what I like and what I don’t. I spent a lot of time with that test, because, honestly, I didn’t know. I didn’t know what I liked and what I preferred.

They made me retake the test, and I failed again. Holy Mackerel… I had no I. I mean I did have an I that threw its weight around, that won competitions, that got thrown out of groups, that pontificated and sympathized with people…

And yet there was no solid I… an I I could return to to be true to myself, to refuel myself, to be free to be myself. Continue reading “You want to be free… free to be yourself… but who are you? You don’t know yourself…”

What if you find that your word has no power?

What if you find that your word has no power?

One of the hardest things for anyone is to know themselves. 2

And not knowing yourself is the cause, not just correlation, of the most misery.

Why you don’t know yourself? Thousands of reasons… knowing yourself also obeys the Anna Karenina Principle.

This article will not be about that. This article will be about the price you pay for not knowing yourself.

Continue reading “What if you find that your word has no power?”

Are feelings and emotions the same? Do you know?

Are feelings and emotions the same? Do you know?

Telling them apart will make you a happier, more accomplished person!

Why all techniques of increasing Emotional Intelligence are b.s…

…and not effecting the level of happiness, the level of well-being of people who practice it.

Same is true about the Emotional Guidance System of Abraham/ Hicks… b.s. and ineffective. Why? Because they are trying to change the fruits instead of the roots… Putting makeup on syphilitic lesions. 3 Or pimples, if you are squeamish…

Feelings are clean. They do four simple things. Make you go for it, make you stop, direct you towards pleasure and away from pain… They are the seed level. The foundation. 4Feelings are what guides you as an organism to feed yourself, to procreate, to stay safe, or to fight. To have a community to belong to, and to have enough information so you know what to do[/note.]

Emotions are a construct on the top of them, created by words, created by marker feelings, and are a veritable mess.
Continue reading “Are feelings and emotions the same? Do you know?”

Osho: Self-knowledge is the most difficult thing – because you are scared to know about yourself

Osho on self-knowledgeYesterday I wrote about the “nut” that unless you break it and see what’s in it, your life will be lived out in the misery of duality. There is help available, here, because you need someone who is ruthlessly compassionate.

Of course you want someone who’ll console you, who’ll coddle you, but if you really want to get to the other side of it, and start the process of becoming real, you need someone who doesn’t buy into your fantasy about yourself, that even you know it’s a fantasy.

I, honestly, don’t expect any of you to be ready. It’s not a rate thing, I could offer it for free, and you wouldn’t be interested enough to come.

The Playground was a long version of this process, and a total of three-four people attended regularly. Of course there I didn’t tell people what was required of them… maybe I didn’t really know… I only realized the significance after 2-3 months passed.

Here is an Osho talk, talking about this exact topic. Enjoy.

Self-knowledge is the most difficult thing – not because it is difficult, but because you are scared to know about yourself. A deep fear exists. Everybody is trying to escape, escape from himself. This fear has to be understood. And if this fear exists, whatsoever you do will not be of much help. You may think that you want to know yourself, but if this unconscious fear is there you will continuously avoid, you will continuously try to hide, deceive. On the one hand you will try to know yourself, and on the other hand you will create all sorts of hindrances so that you cannot know.

Continue reading the talk on my Osho site

Osho: Self-knowledge is the most difficult thing

Osho and self-knowledge

People ask my why I discontinued the Playground.

After all I loved that program… so why not continue indefinitely.

Two reasons: 1. There were only four participants. But that is not enough reason. 2. The Playground is a knowing yourself program, but knowing yourself needs to be done by you, not by me. People kept coming, but they didn’t continue the work of getting to know themselves at home, in their own time… So all that “self-knowledge” work I did with them was wasted.

Why? Because stronger forces won… You’ll see in this amazing talk, 40 years ago by Osho.

What’s wrong with my Wife?
29 August 1974 am in Buddha Hall THE NINTH SAYING

JESUS SAID: THE MOTE THAT IS IN THY BROTHER’S EYE THOU SEEST, BUT THE BEAM THAT IS IN THINE EYE THOU SEEST NOT. WHEN THOU CASTEST THE BEAM OUT OF THINE EYE, THEN THOU WILT SEE CLEARLY TO CAST THE MOTE OUT OF THY BROTHER’S EYE.

Self-knowledge is the most difficult thing – not because it is difficult, but because you are scared to know about yourself.

Read the rest of this amazing talk on my Osho page

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJQd7T-q_Og

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