Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

Boys, Girls, Gender, and coming to peace…

Boys… I used to want to be a boy.

They seem unperturbed. They laugh a lot.

Today I prefer to be a woman. But as a child I really KNEW something was missing, and for years I thought it was cut off…

I really love this picture. It tells me that boys have more fun.

I remember sitting on the potty waiting for my navel to burst. And I knew it was only a matter of time. I KNEW that I was mutilated below, and I was mutilated there. Although I didn’t know what was cut off, I knew that whatever it was I needed it.

I was 3-4 years old. My feet didn’t touch the ground yet.

I knew I wasn’t welcome, I knew that boys had more of everything. They were loved more. And knew it was permanent. Continue reading “Boys, Girls, Gender, and coming to peace…”

You’d rather be right than be happy or rich…

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You’d rather be right than happy, you’d rather be right than rich… Your microexpressions will give you away

I had a few remarkable experiences the past few days.

The conclusions from these experiences make me mad, angry, bitter, and hopeless… but that should not surprise you: the condition of humanity is hopeless.

Continue reading “You’d rather be right than be happy or rich…”

A new lease on life. How I got, unexpectedly, what joy is

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Last night I had a conversation with myself and Source.

As I shared in my previous post, I have lived my whole life based on an untrue assumption that I was living on borrowed time, and at any time it can be taken away.

I saw that life needs to be set up in a way that matches that base assumption: don’t own anything, travel lightly, don’t get attached, don’t… don’t… don’t…

Don’t love deeply…

All to avoid personal loss. Because all can be taken away in a heartbeat. Continue reading “A new lease on life. How I got, unexpectedly, what joy is”

I am not good enough. Other people are better than me

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This was people’s sentence, predominantly, when I first did my Landmark Education programs, back in mid-1980’s.

I remember asking myself: in what aren’t they good enough? Compared to what?

I could see that they don’t ask those questions… It is a 3-year old, barely able to speak, who says those things.

The language of the ‘sentence’, sentence as in ‘you are sentenced to lifetime imprisonment without parole’ was made up by your 3-year old… And the problem is in the language on the intellectual level of a 3-year old.

Not good enough, if your child genes turned off when they were supposed to turn off, is a great guidance. It tells you where you need work, where you need to grow, where you need to get better.

But that is an adult speaking… Not a child. An adult who can look and see… Continue reading “I am not good enough. Other people are better than me”

2 ‘Getting Things Done’ systems, and what people really do

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I have always liked getting things done.

I like getting things done. Why? Because everything that doesn’t get done is like an energetic attachment, like a ball and chain on your ankle, slows you down, and prevents you from soaring… having a good time, feeling free and unencumbered.

I don’t like feeling heavy, burdened, or guilty, so I learn, test, experiment with methods that allow me to be free.

I even like to be lighter in weight because I don’t like to be heavy in any way, including physically.

I handle problems, issues, doubts, the same way… handle them so the weights can disappear.
Continue reading “2 ‘Getting Things Done’ systems, and what people really do”

Emotional detox? What can it do for you??

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Before you can go up, you need to go down! Just like in building a house.

Because unless you clear off the “stuff” and then dig deep to know what’s under the top soil, your house will be warped and collapse in a hurry, often while you are building it.

For most of you this is really bad news, because you are hellbent on staying phony happy, phony loving, phony well… delusional high self-esteem-ed, and you are unwilling to even look at what is real. But what’s real is real, and if you ignore it it will bite you in the a-s-s. No compassion, no looking, just continuing what isn’t working, and never will work is stupid… Here, I said it. Stupid. Continue reading “Emotional detox? What can it do for you??”

Self-Punishment, Self-Punishing Behavior, the why

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This topic comes from a reader, thank you. Without her prompting I would have never looked there. It would have been a big missing.

I am going to share only what I really know, from my experience, not some theories of some big names, like Freud… I am giving you only Tree of Life. Continue reading “Self-Punishment, Self-Punishing Behavior, the why”

Do you meet others’ expectations? There is a price to pay

If you are on this site, you will find yourself, more or less, in this article. And it may change your life.

A student writes

Hi Sophie, I think I take trivial and superficial things too seriously. How can I let go of these immaterial incidents or people and focus on important things that truly matter to me?

this was my answer

“This is the sign of two things: 1. your map of reality isn’t very similar to reality. 2. you have too much importance attached to nice words about you… i.e. you want to be defined by words not by your actions.
Continue reading “Do you meet others’ expectations? There is a price to pay”

What is Freedom? What is Liberty? What is the difference?

Freedom versus Liberty, those who thrive, survivors, or those fallen by the wayside

When I ask people what they want, many say they want freedom. When we poke into it: they want a sense of freedom, but think the way to get to freedom is through liberty… Let me explain.

Just like with all words we use, here is huge confusion, a collapse of two distinctions: freedom and liberty. They are not connected. They don’t even overlap!
Continue reading “What is Freedom? What is Liberty? What is the difference?”

Arrogance, appreciation, Sherlock, myself and your pebble

If you have attended one of my Pebble webinars, you know that your pebble is your dominant desire that the world at large frowns at.

I have seen, on the calls, the desire to be significant, the desire to be different, the desire to belong, to be accepted, the desire to be untied, unburdened, allowed to be yourself, the desire to live on Easy Street, and the desire to do something that really matters.

There are more, but these are the desires that have been represented on the calls already. We have a lot more calls scheduled, so there is a chance that we’ll see a lot more.

The desire, when you look at it, is legitimate. You may have the same desire. Unfortunately to you, your dominant desire was not honored as valid, not honored as legitimate by your parents, your siblings, your teachers, your church, your peers.
Continue reading “Arrogance, appreciation, Sherlock, myself and your pebble”