Always misjudged, misunderstood? No one sees your genius?

Are you always misjudged, misunderstood, or mistreated? No one can see how bright you are?
misunderstood genius... slightedThe art of being heard, being known the right way

On one of the webinars the topic was “Not being heard… Being misunderstood”

Every person on the call had at least one painful childhood incident where their speaking wasn’t getting for them what they intended to get, instead their speaking was earning them grief and heart ache.

They wanted appreciation, understanding, equality, or love, validation, significance, or at least agreement.

When something doesn’t work, one would expect, next time you’ll try something different. But no… in real life it seems that the more something doesn’t work, the more you, humans are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

When we looked, each and every one of us were repeating and repeating and repeating the incident in our lives, the same way, expecting a different result. Insanity, right? Continue reading “Always misjudged, misunderstood? No one sees your genius?”

Yesterday was one of my worst days and one of my best days.

Things were falling apart on me. Both my computers misbehaved, and threatened me with a situation of no computer… not good, not good.

Two partner calls I listened to showed me that half of my students didn’t, don’t get what is supposed to be done in the Playground.

You can only imagine how it felt…

My home page, using the terminology from Transactional Analysis, is devastated… So I felt devastated… as if my life were destroyed.

I have a devastated/discouraged machine

I have seen this enough time to know that it’s the machine… so I chuckled… Continue reading “Yesterday was one of my worst days and one of my best days.”

If the invisible reality is invisible, how can you see it?

If the invisible reality is invisible, how can you see it?

This article is about one of those invisible dynamics mainly: the distinction: listening

All power is in the listening.

If you aren’t getting as much out of your participation with me and my stuff, then consider that it is not the stuff: it is you. You unconsciously or consciously block, invalidate, judge, agree or disagree with what I say.

I often catch myself with hate and grief arising when I read or study someone’s stuff… and it takes a little bit to resolve that before I can get any benefit out of the reading or studying.

But I do it… Do you? I didn’t think so. Continue reading “If the invisible reality is invisible, how can you see it?”

I woke up today feeling good about myself… so? what is the big deal?! Right?

I woke up today feeling good about myself.

Why mention it? Because feeling good about myself is not as frequent as one would think… I could say: I felt better about myself than normal.

Feeling good about yourself is the basis of self-love… that being at home feeling we all crave, but most of us have no idea how to get.

It was, that craving, expressed yesterday by the participants of my workshop 1 to ferret out the issues of the self and brainstorm about a direction that could pull you out of the issue.

Direction, pull you out? Yeah.

Some 16 years ago I was doing a course in New York City, and I was commuting there from Syracuse NY, every week. It was the snowiest winter in my memory. One time I drove down during the day… normally I drove at night when the traffic was sparse. A drive faster and more confidently in snow that others.

And my attitude was: get out of my way! A mix of angry, hurried, superior… not pretty. And suddenly my car slipped to the left and slipped into the snow bank. Continue reading “I woke up today feeling good about myself… so? what is the big deal?! Right?”

The average truth value of good articles only 7%

The average truth value of good articles only 7%
Why is the average truth value of a good article only around 7%? That is a very low number! Please explain…

As you may have noticed, it is harder and harder for me to write an article a day. There are 4000 articles on this site, and they all came easily… if I remember correctly. But suddenly I have nothing to say.

Or better said: I have only to say something when someone asks me, like in coaching or on a webinar… otherwise I feel there is no listening for me to say something, therefore I have no desire, no urgency to say anything. Continue reading “The average truth value of good articles only 7%”

What’s important to you? Do your actions mirror that?

What’s important to you? Do your actions mirror that?

Just look at your actions. Words are cheap. Only what you do counts, only what you do testifies about what is important to you.

It seems that being right, looking good, avoid domination of anyone or anything, including your own word, hoping, expecting the impossible… etc, etc, has been really important to you.

Where you are is where you are supposed to be, given all your actions.

Do all actions count? Talking, thinking, watching videos?

Only to a certain degree.

One of the people who have inspired me for many years is Werner Erhard, the founder of the est training.

What did he do? Continue reading “What’s important to you? Do your actions mirror that?”

Bach Energy: the Yew: Desire to receive for the self alone

Bach Energy: the Yew: Desire to receive for the self alone

Original publication date: March 11, 2012. Today all day I am reminded of this time…

The 39th Bach Flower Remedy: the Yew: Desire to receive for the self alone

One of the benefits, for me, to do the Connection Calls is being with all of you, and feeling how wretched, how miserable you feel. Not pleasant for me, but very useful. Continue reading “Bach Energy: the Yew: Desire to receive for the self alone”

Lack of purpose? lack of meaning? how to find?

Lack of purpose? lack of meaning? how to find?

One of the things all humans crave is consistency and stability. And, or course, if you live a life outside of a cage, outside of a managed care facility, those are hard to come by.

The only constant in reality is change… constant, maddening change. As soon as you get used to a new thing… the next new thing comes…

And humans don’t adjust well to change, don’t want change, don’t like change.

Don’t do well with change…

One of my students… they may have to move back to California…

I’m flailing with my emotions at the moment and being swept away by the ever changing circumstances of my daily life. I need an anchor. Your input would be great. Thank you.

and another student, not being able to get a job: Continue reading “Lack of purpose? lack of meaning? how to find?”

The risk of living a life without a purpose… no direction

The risk of living a life without a purpose… no direction
A purpose is not automatic… or if anything can be called automatic, it is always bad… or inappropriate

We, humanity, are more attuned to danger, bad feelings, than we are to good feelings… And it is natural, given our size and defenselessness in the natural world.

In order to get anything done, you cannot rely on your natural inclination, it won’t be helpful. Your natural inclination is to do nothing much, reserve your energies, unless you are hungry, you are horny, or you are in danger. Continue reading “The risk of living a life without a purpose… no direction”

Simplicity, Elegance, Coherence, Ask a different question

Simplicity… Elegance… Coherence… Ask a different question…

We tend to look at the world in black and white terms. This or the opposite…

You and me… 2

But often what you think is the opposite is not…

My current favorite book, 46 rules of Genius, says:
“Rule 24 (of Genius)

“SIMPLIFY

“People tend to view simplicity and complexity as opposites. But this isn’t strictly true. The enemy of simplicity isn’t complexity, but disorder. And the enemy of complexity is also disorder.

  • While complexity seeks order through addition,
  • simplicity seeks order through subtraction.

Continue reading “Simplicity, Elegance, Coherence, Ask a different question”