Why is it that you can’t tell if somebody is smart or not? You can’t tell you are smart… or not either. It is because in the dark all cats are gray
One of the most surprising thing in the world of humans is that humans can’t tell if they are smart or not. This error leads to lives that are not fulfilled. Lives that are filled with fear, trepidation, or on the other extreme: boasting and disappointment.
This is a horrible thing. Do you know what is the worst thing about me for me?
The other day I used the free community van to get to stores I cannot get to easily on my own.
Note: in the illustrations I am not taking sides. I am illustrating that there is confusion and disagreement in what race. what is racist. what is racism, and what it does is it makes people rigid, lie about what they think, and vote for Trump… ugh.
The driver of the van has a PhD in sociology He asked me if it bothered me if he continued to listen to NPR radio, National Public Radio. There was a public debate on Trump and on the question whether he was a racist or not. Continue reading “Equality, racist, collusion, big words you throw around”
As we are embarking on another 30-day challenge to activate seeing in reality… I change the focus and therefore the process, but want to achieve the same thing: accuracy, astuteness, intelligence… in seeing what is in reality and have accurate, astute and intelligent responses in return.
Because, as weird as it sounds, the best the collective human race can do, at this stage is a 1% accuracy… which isn’t sufficient for happiness, peace of mind, powerful life… none of it.
Why? Because we look not out there, but in here… in the mind, and we keep seeing the same thing, regardless what is outside.
Your vibration, everyone’s main concern, can only be high as your astuteness is… this is why the average vibration on the planet is falling like a rock… it is 100 in 2020. When I started this website, in 2011, the average vibration was, if I remember correctly, 150… 100 is the level of religion, any ideology, fascism, communism, racism…
So, although I can’t do much for the Planet, I can help individuals lift themselves from the morass and see more, and see more accurately.
The easiest method and fastest method of doing that is validation, the practice, coupled with the DNA capacity activation.
To be able to get into the vibration of appreciation (300 on the map of consciousness) or get into the vibration of gratitude (above 300 on the map of consciousness), you would need to be a vibrational match to either, and 99.99% of the population isn’t.
The good news is: the act of validation will temporarily raise your vibration to that same vibrational frequency and that is the vibrational frequency where you can TEMPORARILY activate the Law of Attraction and have your desires be fulfilled. You can start exactly where you are.
If you diligently practice validation, you will be able to keep your vibrational frequency at this high level. You will experience first-hand what having a higher vibration is like: pure bliss.
Let me explain the process of validation
You find something worthy of acknowledgment in another.
It can be big or small. You can always find something easy to start with: you have nice teeth, or you smell good, or your socks are a fabulous color. Practice this first to find out that people, if you are honest, will appreciate being seen…
Next, a step harder, is to have a goal in mind: one could be: to experience being heard by another. I have a student for whom that would be reason to celebrate.
Another goal could be to bring a smile to another’s face.
Mine is often to experience people returning to the present moment. I’ll feel it because I will experience that they can actually see me. Not an easy feat… I don’t always succeed. You show up for them as a disruption… ok, I do… lol. Hey, I am a disrupter…
Why does validation work? Why it alters YOU? Why it’s worth doing?
Validation coupled with the DNA activation is like getting glimpses of heaven.
Validation is much like smiling. Once you start it, it causes a state change. Your mood start matching the smile, it goes up with it. You don’t have to feel like smiling when you start, and when you end it, you can’t help feeling happy.
In the beginning you will have to strain yourself to find anything worthy of acknowledgment. But as you practice, it will be easier and easier.
I remember when I started I looked at people’s clothing, their bodies, their hair to find something to acknowledge. Then I graduated to behavior, and later to who they really are. Today I am able to connect to their real self and acknowledge that.
Catch: in order for validation to work for you, you actually need to look before you speak. Which means, you can’t just become a robot, and spout nice things, that will actually lower your vibration. Trickery doesn’t work in the world of vibration.
Remember that this exercise only raises your vibration while you are doing it. So doing it diligently is your best bet.
Eventually you’ll be able to keep the DNA capacity open… but continuing living a life of a validator is, I say, mandatory to keep the capacity open so you can see
Put up reminders around you. After a long while it will become second nature to you. By then your vibration was permanently impacted.
The 30-day Validation challenge starts on Monday, 10/26/2020
I activate the capacity and let you know in an email.
So, as you see, the first exercise for validation asks you to see… and tell them. See more every day, and tell them.
A second exercise for validation is different
It talks to something you can’t see. It is designed to open up your sight to see what you have been denied access to by your own mind.
Some twenty years ago I had a homework in one of the courses I did to acknowledge a missing item, something I could not see, something that was missing for me. The instructions were: lie authentically.
That sounds like an oxymoron, doesn’t it? lie and authentic in the same sentence? Bah.
But it worked brilliantly. It took me a week and 43 people, but by the 44th I could actually see free, my missing item, and acknowledge it authentically. Until that point I just said the words, and was very surprised that people thanked me for noticing it, or just nodded in agreement. I really could not see… but they could. They had a different missing item, not the same as mine.
I have used this in my coaching with the same surprising results.
My missing item was “free.” Yours will be likely different.
So my acknowledgment was: “I see that you are free.” Or “I acknowledge you for being free”.
If your missing item is powerful, then you would say: “I can see that you are powerful”. You’ll be surprised to see how many people will be pleased to hear it.
This second exercise, done properly and past the time that you can actually see your missing item, raises your vibration permanently.
I just got an email from a long time student who said:
how can something that is all about me raise my vibration? After all my missing item is ‘belonging’… and it is all about me.
My answer is: the exercise is to acknowledge that they have your missing item… and that is not about you. If I tell you: I see you are loved, and you smile and feel warm all over, and say, thank you… was that about me? No.
So none of the validation exercises are about you. If at any point you feel it’s about you, then you are doing some ego exercise.
If you think you are ready to make the jump, please do so before Monday
For decades one of my sore spots was that people refused to serve me, even though I paid them.
I remember saying to myself: my money is not good enough for you? and wept.
I had no idea how I “accomplished” that… in 20/20 hindsight it is still a little spotty.
What wasn’t clear to me, never even occurred to me, how my attitude effected the service provider. My “To what degree you think of yourself:” starting point measure was, at the time, 70%. From my behavior I would have guessed it was higher.
Mainly I overrode what they said. I argued, I knew better, I acted with contempt…
What I didn’t know then is that being a service provider needs to be a win, or no service.
A customer who is not happy is a drag on an provider, and not worth the little (or even a lot of) money they pay.
What you say and what you do… when it comes to your children becoming educated, productive people
One of the signs of the overwhelming inauthenticity and low level of integrity is the gap between what people say and what people do.
My definition of authenticity is that there is nothing in the unsaid. Nothing in the unsaid that isn’t consistent with what is visible…
In essence, no lying by omission.
Authenticity is one of those big words that no one knows what it really means… so they go by feeling. The simplest way to define authenticity is that there is no pretense, no façade, no game playing. The person is the same through and through. When they are seen and when they are not.
Most people smile a lot in their pictures, but I can feel their anxiety, their fear, their inner trembling. An inauthentic smile.
One more thing that I haven’t said before, but given that we are working with memes and affirmations: if you obey memes, if you repeat memes, if you try to fit in with memes, you cannot be authentic.
Because your inner you, whether you know who it is or what it is, knows that what you are saying, what you are doing is not you… you are trying to fit in. Fitting in is not authentic.
Werner has a saying about authenticity: he says we are always inauthentic, so we can only be authentic (tell the truth) about our inauthenticity.
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One of the measures in the Starting Point Measurements is the inauthenticity measure.
I have been surveying mothers and fathers of children to find out to what degree they care about their children’s future.
Life wants more life… so one would assume that both men and women will want their children to become all they can become.
And when it comes to lip-service, this is often what they say.
But when it comes to putting their money where their mouth is… the truth is vastly different.
Less than one percent of women spend money on their children’s future. Education, skill building, music lessons, language lessons, educational toys, etc.
30% of men do.
If you listen to memes, you are now surprised.
Memes tout women as more caring, but these numbers talk against the memes.
Actually, in my experience, what women see as caring makes their children dependent on them, and makes their children a TLB-1…
Having barely any chance of making it in life.
TLB 1 people want me to be nice to them, to protect them, to be like a mother. But the whole field of mother-child is bankrupt when it comes to helping children become strong adults.
The words ‘caring’ and ‘love’ mean different things to different people: there is barely any agreement about any of it.
But we can agree to disagree… how women hear the words love and caring, I am guessing from their behavior, is being loved and being cared for.
To women it means Receiving. Desire to receive for the self alone.
While men hear it, maybe, as a giving, as an earning, as something that allows them to function in the world better, given that their sexual needs, and maybe some other needs can be taken care of.
In my occasional conversations, women behave like this 80% of the time, or maybe it is 80% of women 100% of the time?
I don’t know.
But the number of women who don’t recognize what ‘deal’ they entered when they got married is staggering. The deal the man thought was made, what the man thought the deal was is that the woman will help their spouse make a living. That the will become mothers to the future generation so the man’s genes will get expression.
This is not only true about talented, high earning women: this is true for women who are not high earning, not learned, not highly skilled.
And of course between parties who didn’t spell out the ‘deal’, and now they are at odds, the children are a burden, or mere negotiating chips.
I do see exceptions, when the woman is exceptional.
And occasionally I do see role reversals as well.
This is not genetic. This is meme based.
The genes know what is important.
The memes say what is profitable for the meme creators.
Don’t be mistaken: memes, the meme creators have a profit motive, and they may also have an overwhelming desire to create a zombie consumer society where they can sway popular opinion at will.
All you need to do to create a zombie consumer society is to keep people be interested in some vague ideal that they need to fill, be pretty, thin, crave sex, and to harass the men so they can never feel at peace and in balance.
Or be a career woman who fights for equal income, even if she can’t focus at work with sick children at home. To have the children be a burden.
No matter which direction the memes sway you, you are not on the side of life.
All the shoulds and all the should nots are memes. All of them. With one agenda: to keep you out of balance, to keep you buying stuff… to be needy and wanty.
For many centuries it was only religion with its memes. But today… with the social sites… ugh.
With more and more memes every generation of humans is less sturdy, less hardy, less willing to be a self-starter when it comes to educating themselves… because there is hardly anyone who cares about it… other than caring to give lip-service.
The Reality Challenge will be ongoing… so you can sign up if you are at all interested in weeding out the memes… so you can start being the driver of your life.
I hear the Catholic church’s call for whatever they do at 6 pm… and today I hum with it, I hear it as music. And I remember that I used to hear it as noise.
This brings me to August Rush.
I think, most likely it’s a corny movie. And yet, it is one of the movies I go back to with regularity. And weep.
