Yesterday was one of my worst days and one of my best days.

Things were falling apart on me. Both my computers misbehaved, and threatened me with a situation of no computer… not good, not good.

Two partner calls I listened to showed me that half of my students didn’t, don’t get what is supposed to be done in the Playground.

You can only imagine how it felt…

My home page, using the terminology from Transactional Analysis, is devastated… So I felt devastated… as if my life were destroyed.

I have a devastated/discouraged machine

I have seen this enough time to know that it’s the machine… so I chuckled… Continue reading “Yesterday was one of my worst days and one of my best days.”

If the invisible reality is invisible, how can you see it?

This article is about one of those invisible dynamics mainly: the distinction: listening

All power is in the listening.

If you aren’t getting as much out of your participation with me and my stuff, then consider that it is not the stuff: it is you. You unconsciously or consciously block, invalidate, judge, agree or disagree with what I say.

I often catch myself with hate and grief arising when I read or study someone’s stuff… and it takes a little bit to resolve that before I can get any benefit out of the reading or studying.

But I do it… Do you? I didn’t think so. Continue reading “If the invisible reality is invisible, how can you see it?”

The average truth value of good articles only 7%

Why is the average truth value of a good article only around 7%? That is a very low number! Please explain…

As you may have noticed, it is harder and harder for me to write an article a day. There are 4000 articles on this site, and they all came easily… if I remember correctly. But suddenly I have nothing to say.

Or better said: I have only to say something when someone asks me, like in coaching or on a webinar… otherwise I feel there is no listening for me to say something, therefore I have no desire, no urgency to say anything. Continue reading “The average truth value of good articles only 7%”

How to have all the skeletons in your closet come alive and conspire against the future you invented, the future you desire?

skeletons-in-the-closetThere is a myth humans hold onto, that if they stay angry and something or someone, then they are better people than who they are angry at.

All pretense… which is bad in and of itself, but there is more…

When you are mad at something you did, or mad at someone who did something you recognize… then you are hooked.

Hooked on that angry mode of existence.

Locked in the anger, locked out of freedom, future, happiness.

As long as you hold onto that anger.

I think it may be useful to dig deeper at the invisible dynamic…

Your anger, your hate seems to be against someone. They did something…

But underneath, under the surface, not even deep, is the real cause:
Continue reading “How to have all the skeletons in your closet come alive and conspire against the future you invented, the future you desire?”

How we keep our self-worth, self-value low

I have been posting my articles on Medium, an online platform, for the past two years.

This morning I was tallying up what articles were well read, well thought of… and was pondering if I should write articles that people like, or if I should continue writing articles that people need. Articles that only I can write… writing those is more fun for me. Continue reading “How we keep our self-worth, self-value low”

What if it is unlikely that you can become the best version of you? Is it still worth going for it?

Something I just read made me get up from bed and come back to my computer. It is something I have almost forgotten… even though it was one of the most important things I have ever learned.

It is: instead of fighting the bad, grow the good.

Of course, some of the principles we live by become invisible… this is one of those.

It’s not my invention. In fact the two wolves the Indian (Native American) tale speaks of, use exactly this principle: feed the good in you.

But the way it was worded in the book I just read was more profound. It says: Let me grow more of the good myself so the bad is less of me.

I didn’t need to kill the iceman (in me). I didn’t even need to fight him. I just needed to make more of myself, so that he would be less of me.

Continue reading “What if it is unlikely that you can become the best version of you? Is it still worth going for it?”

Can’t learn? Won’t learn? Is that how you keep yourself stuck in life?

I am still struggling with having something or anything to say. Now I have the energy, but don’t have the … what?

What don’t I have, and why is that important to know what it is that you don’t have?

The number one need of people, I say, is the desire to make a difference.

But when I say ‘make a difference’ I don’t mean the big flashy things, like Bill Gates curing malaria… I mean being wanted to be there. That you are not refused.

Cain killed Abel in the Bible, because god accepted Abel’s sacrifice, but not his. He, Cain, got furious, and killed who he could killed, Abel.

Feeling refused, feeling not wanted is the cause of the biggest pain, and unfortunately people carry that in their unconscious for the length of their lives.

Continue reading “Can’t learn? Won’t learn? Is that how you keep yourself stuck in life?”

Invisible dynamic that has your foot nailed to the floor

Do you get fixated on what’s wrong with you? With what’s wrong with the world? With what you want? With what should be?

Fixate or abdicate is the “normal” binary behavior. Neither behavior serves you… it serves the machine.

I woke up this morning with a start. I had a nightmare.

I was in some exam situation where I was slowly losing my ability to grasp anything. I could not follow the instructions, and then in a lecture I didn’t understand a word the instructor, a woman with a southern accent said. Continue reading “Invisible dynamic that has your foot nailed to the floor”

Become all you can become? Why? How? Aren’t you?

Become all you can become? Why? How? Aren’t you already all you can become?

Yesterday I spent about four hours listening to Jordan Peterson. The material I listened to was a truth value of 30%… not bad. Continue reading “Become all you can become? Why? How? Aren’t you?”

Spiritual Arrogance

1-spiritual-arrogance-pict-1Humans have a dual nature, a dual nature that is the enemy of growth, enemy of learning, enemy to the survival of the species…

Arrogance and pride…

Arrogance is duality itself.

  • It says, on one hand: I already know. I know. I am beyond that.
  • On the other hand: OMG, I am so stupid. I make so many mistakes. I better slow down, and not be so sure.

We call the arrogant side “it” in this article. And it talks. And it knows. And it pontificates…

What “it” says it knows? It knows everything. It knows if it is worth it to listen, if it is worth for you to do. It knows if you can. It knows the future, the past, what it all means, what it doesn’t mean, what it’s all about, what is important and what isn’t. Continue reading “Spiritual Arrogance”