Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

Your standards and ideals. Rulemaking. Wanting to win…

…every step of the way

Here are a few unexpected ways you keep yourself trapped in your misery:

1. You have a standard for everything and everyone but often not yourself.

How it should be, how it should go, what is right and what is wrong behavior, looks, everything.

You apply these standards to measure everything and everyone… and, of course, everything and everyone falls short… including yourself.

Standards are something that you invented, or alternatively bought into. You relate to them as if they were universal and mandatory for everyone…

It is all made up. There are no standards that survive reality: these are all made up reality, not binding to everyone, maybe not even to anyone. Continue reading “Your standards and ideals. Rulemaking. Wanting to win…”

How bad news can be a godsend or how to eliminate neediness?

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Bad news. On my way home, climbing the long stairway off Euclid Avenue, I was listening to Step 21 of the 67 Steps. It’s about the superpower of being able to get into a relationship with people. Get into a relationship because you can see how their machine works. and because you see it, therefore you can speak their language.

Everything comes to you through people… and…

…you cannot get more abundance than what your people skills allow you to have.

I have been resigned about my ability to get better at dealing with people.

Resigned means: I have a fixed mindset about it, that says: it may be possible for you, but it’s impossible for me. Continue reading “How bad news can be a godsend or how to eliminate neediness?”

Guiding feelings. Are you guided to look away? Run?

Do you know the difference between a feeling and an emotion? You don’t? I hadn’t, until recently.

So I would have never thought of asking this question prior to reading Margoczi’s books, Feelings and Words a few years ago.

Before, I learned in Landmark Education that regret, remorse, resentment, the ‘infamous’ three R’s are useless, and harmful.

But today I dare to differ. Continue reading “Guiding feelings. Are you guided to look away? Run?”

Remorse, regret, and self-recrimination…

Remorse is the ability to humble oneself and healthily repent for past mistakes ~ Ryan Fan

I read an article yesterday about Scientology children who left the ‘mother ship’.

I am left with just one thing from the article: in Scientology they train you to have no feelings, no expression.

I remember being in a Landmark Education program, years ago, that railed against the 3 R’s… regret, resentment, and I don’t remember the third. But they were wrong.

I have more time nowadays. I have more room for bad feelings too. And I don’t think they shouldn’t be.

I don’t hurry and run away from bad feelings.

Continue reading “Remorse, regret, and self-recrimination…”

Are you stingy with yourself? Do you say you don’t deserve?

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Are you stingy with yourself? Do you say you don’t deserve?

You may be. And you may be right.

One of the obvious signs of stinginess with yourself is that you don’t give yourself enough time to do what there is to do, enough time so you could actually ENJOY what you are doing.

I call this ‘homework attitude’, where you are more interested in checking an activity off your todo list than actually doing it, enjoying it, savoring it.

And to no one’s surprise, you can do everything with this homework stingy attitude. Sex. Conversations. Dinner. Reading. And, of course, the 67 steps. Continue reading “Are you stingy with yourself? Do you say you don’t deserve?”

The process to accomplish anything no one I know teaches

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Introducing The bridge building process to get from where you are to where you want to be

One of the hardest thing for people, as I see, is to come up with the bridge between a dream and actions.

You can have the most amazing dream for the future, for a business, if you don’t know what actions to take to get there the dream will remain a dream… unfulfilled. Continue reading “The process to accomplish anything no one I know teaches”

How to go from passenger to the driver of your life?

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The secret is SEEING.

Seeing is a metaskill, says the visual artist.

He probably meant a skill that takes you to the next century. Because it is undeniable that as the world changes, the skillset that makes people make a living even now is not enough to make a living in the future…

Meta, the word, means a go-between. Like a bridge. Going between one and another piece… Like the gap between two things.

And maybe I am twisting words, but unless you have that bridge between how it is, and how you envision it, there is no path.

When I look at the people I have trained, I have consulted, I have had conversations with, the most obvious missing skill was this bridge: seeing it, building it, walking it. Continue reading “How to go from passenger to the driver of your life?”

What prevents you from becoming all you can become?

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If you were a cabbage… would you allow yourself to be trained to become a cauliflower? Roman Cauliflower… like the picture to the left? What prevents you from that?

You want to be more, know more, but you prevent yourself from it… But how?

But how do you prevent yourself from learning, being trained, getting better, growing as a person? Continue reading “What prevents you from becoming all you can become?”

Begin where you are. But begin with the end in mind

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I have been observing people for about 33 years. Before that I had my head entirely up my ass… I wouldn’t have seen anything had I looked: I was too eager trying to get to a place where I can stand on my two feet and look.

Growth is not a gradual and straight path, no matter what anybody says. It’s not like a school…

Continue reading “Begin where you are. But begin with the end in mind”

Can The Sight be useful if you habitually don’t look?

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The willingness to look is a behavior, it’s an attitude, and therefore cannot be activated.

If you act without looking, or if you act from what you stored in your mind, then the activator of the capacity to see the consequences of your actions won’t make any difference.

There is a prerequisite to seeing: and that is looking. Continue reading “Can The Sight be useful if you habitually don’t look?”