What’s your story? Your Troubles Are Repeating Themselves.

What’s your story? Your Troubles Are Repeating Themselves.
The Outcome Is Not Pretty. You Are Trying. You Fail. What’s Going On?

Your Troubles Are Repeating Themselves. your life is scripted. different locales, different characters, but it is the same repeating story. You Are Living Out A Script… The Outcome Is Not Pretty. You Are Trying. You Fail. What’s Going On?

I would dare to say, that repeating a script that only brings you trouble, pain, guilt, shame is the opposite of emotional intelligence.

  • The first “modality” for “emotional intelligence” I encountered was beating. By my mother, occasionally by my father.
  • The second modality I encountered was psychotherapy, by a psychiatrist, who, after two years of therapy, decided that sleeping with me is more fun. I was 16 at the time.

Continue reading “What’s your story? Your Troubles Are Repeating Themselves.”

Focus on the things you can control… but what can you?

Focus on the things you can control… but what can you?

things you can controlYou can only control what belongs to you… Your thoughts, your feelings, your emotions don’t belong to you. Your actions, your attitude, what you actually heed, what you say… they do belong to you.

They are interestingly difficult to see… they are hidden from your view, overcrowded by noise.

We call these here: invisible dynamics. They are tiny machines, their behavior is predictable, manageable, and their effect on your life are detrimental. Continue reading “Focus on the things you can control… but what can you?”

Where every student of mine is lacking is communication.

Where every student of mine is lacking is communication.

One area where every student of mine is lacking is communication.

When suddenly they do something that I consider communication, I cry. Tears of joy. One of my recent articles brought a flurry of communication… but it was a ‘fluke’, an accident, a one time event.

What is communication, really?

The dictionary says: conveying information. Bah humbug.

The purpose of communication is to get what you want, from life, through other people.

Continue reading “Where every student of mine is lacking is communication.”

Carrot and Stick: Becoming someone who can

Carrot and Stick: Becoming someone who can

I wrote this article in 2014… So the webinar sessions it talks about are now a recorded course… Carrot and Stick.

We’ll have the third webinar in the Carrot and Stick series today. The results are mixed, but I am excited. Because it has made people to show their true colors: good or bad.

M from London, a Filipina writes:

Hello Sophie

I want to share with you that what we did last Wednesday (in the Carrot and Stick webinar) is now having an effect on me. Just saying UNWILLING in my mind has some some effect on my body something like a burst of energy and the feeling of ‘I can’t have this same life any more.’

This morning, I don’t know if this is part of the the plan of the universe for me to feel the disgust on how I behave and live my life by accident, I watched something on the internet that made me question how could I live the way I live…. I cried for hours until I felt I could not cry any more.. I have headache and my eyes hurt. I’ve never cried like this before. I feel so disgusted the way I live my life.

In case you are interested this the video that made me feel disgusted with my behaviour and attitude in my life. she won XFactor Israel. The song she sang inspired me which I will keep on listening at the moment to remind me the feeling of disgust with the way I live my life

Thank you so much Sophie. Stick works for me.

Watch the video below that inspired M… https://youtu.be/_LVV750lZkA
Continue reading “Carrot and Stick: Becoming someone who can”

Is it too late for you? Is it too late for you to change?

What do I mean too late? I mean this: The chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken

This saying sounds like the god honest truth, doesn’t it? But when I muscletest, it is only 20% true…

Why is the truth value of something universally accepted as truth?

It is true, because it takes effort and intention and commitment to break bad habits. And we, humans, are not very motivated to change any habit, let alone a habit that gets us pleasure… in another name, payoffs. But when people can see, when people can own that they pay with their lives, a lot more people are interested and are willing to make efforts…

The biggest hindrance is the goodies… What goodies? you ask. Continue reading “Is it too late for you? Is it too late for you to change?”

What is Freedom? What is Liberty? What is the difference?

Freedom versus Liberty, those who thrive, survivors, or those fallen by the wayside

When I ask people what they want, many say they want freedom. When we poke into it: they want a sense of freedom, but think the way to get to freedom is through liberty… Let me explain.

Just like with all words we use, here is huge confusion, a collapse of two distinctions: freedom and liberty. They are not connected. They don’t even overlap!
Continue reading “What is Freedom? What is Liberty? What is the difference?”

What can you learn from The Mind Parasites?

What can you learn from The Mind Parasites?
Can you learn how to have peace of mind, productive, and maybe even happy from Colin Wilson and from the book The Mind Parasites?

Colin Wilson died a few years ago. He left a legacy of of many many books, some of them I have read. His vibration was 200, and yet the book can leave you a lot more empowered than Colin Wilson ever was…

This article is about that… how to be empowered by that book, the idea that there are parasites, mind parasites that have their own agenda in your brain. Continue reading “What can you learn from The Mind Parasites?”

What is the strongest indicator of the quality of your life?

I measure 30 things about a person when they ask for their Starting Point Measurements.

They are all very relevant, but when it comes to the quality of your life, to your life satisfaction, your experience of your life… one could almost say, the level of your happiness depends on one thing.

The level of your happiness depends on one thing

The culture claims that to be happy, you have to have possession, you have to have success, you have to have comfort, safety, fulfillment, companionship, whatever, and, to some degree it may matter but not as much as the number, the measure, just one number told me why 99.99% of the people I have ever measured had a low life satisfaction, even though some had money, success, love even talent… seemingly everything you’d ever wanted. Continue reading “What is the strongest indicator of the quality of your life?”

What is communication? Can you learn it through a course?

What is communication? Can you learn it through a course?

I don’t offer a communication course… I have done Landmark Education’s courses, over and over, and then more. I have learned some moves, but did I really learn the art of communication? No, THAT I haven’t…

But it is time for me to learn it. Now or never. lol.

How do I know? Well, I just said so… but other than that: I am noticing some envy that is always a sign of aspiration: the secret yearning of the soul. I noticed it, recognized it, and now I am going to act on it.

So it’s time. Now or never. Or as they say it at the wedding ceremony: speak now or forever hold your peace…

I am speaking now. Continue reading “What is communication? Can you learn it through a course?”

What is wrong with right and wrong? is it wrong?

What is wrong with right and wrong? is it wrong?
First, let’s clarify what is the meaning of “wrong”…

Many people look at me dumbfounded. There are wrong things and there are right things… everybody knows that… so what can be wrong with what everybody knows? Right?

But you see,

If you want to look for what makes everybody miserable, you better look at what everybody says… and use it as a guidance… either to how to be miserable, or how to get clear of misery.

One thing everybody agrees upon is this: some things are right, most things are wrong and the wrong things need to be fixed, killed, stomped upon, suppressed. And it is very real… except… wrong is made up. Continue reading “What is wrong with right and wrong? is it wrong?”