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One of the emails I never fail to read, and never fail to benefit from in some way is the Monday Morning Memo.
What I like about it, and you probably would hate, judging from many YOUR choices which of my emails to read… What I like most about the Monday Morning Memo, is that it is a sideways view. Sideways from my view.
And as every sideways view the Memo shows the world different from ordinary. Just differently enough so it enriches. Enriches my world, allows me to be happier, more productive with more ease. So it delights me.
I really really love that. My insides purr.
Today’s Monday Morning Memo talks about your natural inclination to enjoy and be good at using your words, your hands, facts and numbers. In what? In your work.
Your natural affinity, your natural inclination
It may change over your life what you favor over what, but not often and not much.
Knowing your order of preference makes choosing projects, profession, work much easier than any other method… and definitely faster than the method in ‘What Color Is Your Parachute‘ that is accurate, but most people don’t have a history of successfully completed projects, so for most people it is useless.
I used to think my order of preference was hands, words, facts, numbers… even though I won competitions in math and physics. But in architecture, my learned profession, I was very very unfulfilled and unhappy.
After leaving architecture I moved to words, hands, facts, numbers. and now my life fits me like a glove. And I don’t have to have hobbies to be myself.
I have forwarded today’s Memo to one of my clients who is in the guidance counselor business. My guidance counselor counseled that I become an accountant… ugh. I am glad I defied her. One of my teachers advised me to become a writer. Writing is words… but I didn’t believe him.
Instead I chose to gather as much to write about as possible for a person… so now I can write.
But how do you decide the order of preference of those four things, those four items?
The methodology is from the ‘What Color Is Your Parachute‘. You can only compare two items, but you can compare two pair’s winners afterward.
So first you compare the first two items, then compare item three and four… and when you are done, you compare the winners of the first pairs, and then compare the losers of the first pairs.
The process is called prioritizing grid, Prioritization Grid or prioritization matrix… You always compare two items… until you get to the real order of preference. You can order many items with this method.
If you have a job, have a business, or not, doing the exercises in that book can be a godsend.
Why? Because if happiness depends on doing things you enjoy and do well, spend time with people you enjoy working with, in an environment that is supportive of you… then it is your job to shift what you are doing, who you are doing it with, and in what environment.
I like to work alone. I like to work in an environment where when I look up I see something I want to see. Also, I like to work in my kitchen or next to my kitchen so going for a cup of tea is not an interruption.
I’d also prefer to have the bathroom that near… unfortunately I don’t have that closeness in my current apartment…
But I am reasonably happy.
I don’t want to be guided by my feelings, hunger, need to eliminate, so I wear a kitchen timer around my neck, and drink water when it goes off, and also go to the bathroom.
Is it ridiculous? lol… Maybe. But it makes me a hell of a productive person. And a happy one. I keep my attention to what matters to me.
I don’t answer the phone. And I check email when I need a little break, eat when I eat, and I feel powerful. I feel that the world is my oyster.
I worked as an architect for 17 years. And, hell, I was wretched, albeit quite successful. Even hated it even when I worked for myself (clients) and from home.
Without words I wither and die.
My hunch is that the people who like to work with me also have words as their main preference.
Anyway, instead of being a bumbling idiot who doesn’t know that there are tools for you to set yourself straight, and pull yourself back from being a beach ball on the wide open ocean… start with the ‘What Color Is Your Parachute‘ book.
Here are two versions, one for teenagers and one for adults.
Instead of vague longings, or vague misery… get clear about what would work for you…
I talk a lot about clarity. Because without clarity you are powerless… Clarity is power. But clarity needs you to get clear all the way to the bottom of the barrel… so you can see what you really don’t want, what you really enjoy and what to get good at.
I have a client who says: ‘I want to be free to be myself‘ but when asked she has no idea what that means.
Another clients is applying for sales jobs, but it isn’t good fit… but why: he doesn’t know.
Yet another client wants to start something new where she makes her own money and is independent. She KNOWS that not being independent is something she hates. She wants to be trained to be a real estate agent. Is that going to make her happy? Is that a good fit for her personality, her conation (the mental faculty of purpose, desire, or will to perform an action; volition.). Will she be good at it? Will she like doing it?
And lastly, here is the link to the Monday Morning Memo article on word, hand, facts and numbers.
This article is part of the Reality vs. Unreality series.
It is clear to me that without learning the difference, without increasing the percentage you spend in reality, nothing else matters. You’ll continue living in quiet desperation.
And don’t lie to yourself. You do live in quiet desperation. Even the 1000, in my muscletesting, lives about 30% of their time in quiet desperation. Even I spend 10% of my time there. I used to spend 100% there… not funny.
And the first step is the first step… Learn to distinguish one thing at a time.
A challenge like I the Reality Challenge, normally cost about a hundred bucks a month. but because it is so important TO ME, and because you can’t see the importance yet, I am cutting the cost 90%…
But, of course, stupid as the stupid does… and arrogant does what arrogant does: you know better.
Anyway, here is the link if you want to be part of the challenge. Make sure you pick your one item to distinguish.
Join the reality challenge.The first 10 days are free
Huh… I would have guessed the words, but the numbers came in second? wow. thank you for doing it. I also saw you signed up to the Reality Challenge. I am happy, Miko. Thank you.
This is great, Sophie, thank you.
I looked and then muscletested it: it seems like my order of preference is words, numbers, hands and facts.