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I have a mirror I got in a course some ten years ago. It is a mirror and on the board it is glued on are the words: ‘I see you‘.
Being seen and NOT being judged, being seen for who you are… and neither be adulated, nor be diminished is a rare experience.
People on social media put on lipstick to be seen not as they are, but as others seem to want them… They are afraid to be seen for who they are, for fear of being judged.
But you are your worst judge… aren’t you? You are NOT witnessing yourself and your own life!
Here is a powerful ‘move’ I have been trying to teach for decades, unsuccessfully.
Why has it been unsuccessful? I think an intellectual and a spiritual capacity are missing.
The move is simple: find the source of your result and acknowledge it.
It’s missing… even the best people can only guess.
Whether it is a scientist or a businessman, a writer or an actor, a salesman or a student, it seems that being able to see the source of YOUR result needs you to have (not known or heard of) a lot of distinctions in the area of the success or failure… the results.
Your future results depend on the accuracy of your assessment here… If you mis-diagnose the cause, you’ll do more or less of that, depending if you want more of that result or less… but you’ll be wrong.
I am very good at seeing the cause… That is why people come to me…
Because even if they cannot see, cannot pinpoint the source of their results, I can, and then they can acknowledge it.
And then something extraordinary happens… they may actually know how to get more of that result.
What is acknowledgment, you ask?
Great question. The dictionary says: acknowledgment is the acceptance of the truth or the existence of something. It says: ‘I see you. You are there, and I see you.‘ In a way it is witnessing. It is validation. In a way it is a generous move… the opposite of stinginess.
What you see can be a thing, a person, an action, intention, expectation, communication, anything.
When a person says: ‘the sky was gray…’ she says that without acknowledgment, without witnessing. You can hear the resistance… She is saying to the sky: ‘you are not what you are supposed to be. You are supposed to be blue…‘
Most of what makes us who we are today, a whole lot less than happy and fulfilled, is this lack of acknowledgment, this lack of witnessing, this lack of distinguishing the source.
The source is ALWAYS in the invisible, in the root region of a result, an action, a mood, an attitude. ALWAYS.
Lack of acknowledgment, lack of witnessing, lack of distinguishing is from who we are.
When the father makes a disgusted face at his infant son’s dirty diaper… the child gets the ‘no’ in that action… and now age 40, still lives out of that ‘I am not OK, I am not what they want me to be‘… and he, age 40, never acknowledges himself, never believes that he is OK, never tries to be himself… always seeking to do what would make him OK with another.
His is not the exception: his experience is more the rule: we are not accustomed to acknowledge ourselves, we are not in the habit of acknowledging another, I can feel it everywhere.
I have a student who has been practicing gratitude… he learned that from the ‘attraction people’…
What is unique about this student is that he keeps on saying: ‘I had never seen it. I had never known it‘
So? Yeah… because he doesn’t know, but what he is saying is at the CORE of acknowledging… what he saw. What he noticed. And his ‘ship’ is gently, imperceptibly turning. It hasn’t turned enough yet… but it is turning. I can see that if he continues ‘noticing’ and acknowledging it, his ship will completely turn around, and he will be a full, independent, autonomous human being… I am getting excited.
The other day I had someone else’s grocery delivered to me. All stuff I can’t eat. Later that day I offered it to another older person in the Community Center, someone I like but have no relationship with other than a few conversations we’ve had.
Yesterday she called me on the phone, a tad drunk, I could tell, to thank me. But she really wanted to ask me why her.
Yes, that is what you become that big question mark when you don’t manage to somehow get acknowledged… you don’t know that you are OK, you don’t know that you deserve what you get. I wept.
I am glad I gave it to her. This learning experience was priceless to me… I had a hunch, but I wasn’t sure… Now I know.
By the way, I am a giver by nature. My experience of myself and my life is ‘abundance’ in most areas, and ‘enough’ in the rest. No lack, no scarcity, no need, and I often have ‘surplus’… and I give it away.
I know other people teach ‘ask and you shall receive‘ or alternatively ‘give and you shall receive‘
Any and all ‘in order to receive‘ actions are manipulative, dishonest and come from neediness.
Neediness repels what you want to receive. What is underneath neediness is stinginess.
When you can acknowledge what is, when you don’t resist it, when you don’t try to fix it, when dont’t say it’s wrong, you become a huge magnet for what is coming towards you.
But it’s hard, and it is hard for you, because it is against your nature. Stingy, entitled, needy.
In essence, my programs are all about this: all about not making anything wrong…
As long as anything is wrong, in the present or in the past, you are not done. The wrong is still there, calling the shot.
Your vibration rises with every previous wrong acknowledged as ‘not wrong, nothing missing… that is what happened, this is who I was, this is who I am.‘
No guilt, no shame, no blame, no fixing, no grief, no suffering.
From that new root joy and happiness and abundance can grow.
Let’s get to the very root… shall we? If we can at least weaken that ‘wrong’ then we are off to a good start.
Moneyroots workshopRemember: insights are a dime a dozen. Breakthroughs are rare. And consistent growth is as rare as snow in July.
