Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

If I see you as beautiful… will you too?

If I see you as beautiful… will you see yourself as beautiful?
If I see you as magnificent, great, awesome… will you see yourself like I do?

Muscletest and my experience says: no.

The most beautiful women spend hours in front of the mirror staring at their imperfections… trying to hide them.

There are also beautiful women who can say: so what. They are in search of some other imperfection.

We know ourselves intimately, and rare is the person who can leave it alone… who can refrain bemoaning their faults, and stop trying to fix themselves while keeping up appearances.
Continue reading “If I see you as beautiful… will you too?”

The 3 levels of value: an amazing process to love yourself

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In this article I’ll teach you something that has the potential to turn you into a happy, joyful person. No kidding.

Also, it can serve as the bridge between human and human being…

From that you can guess: the distinctions in this article are high level.

At present, if you are a ‘normal’ human, you are judging yourself and others. You are miserable, wretched, prone to get happy, get sad, get depressed at the drop of a hat. Continue reading “The 3 levels of value: an amazing process to love yourself”

Worry. Worry. Worry. Just worry and you won’t win

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I have to admit, I would have never thought to write this article, without reading Andy Shaw’s book, Creating a Bug Free Mind. He writes extensively about worry.

I never thought of myself as a worrier, but, of course, I still worry from time to time. Nowhere near as much as others.

They call it fear of failure, anxiety, but it is all worry. Continue reading “Worry. Worry. Worry. Just worry and you won’t win”

Learning lessons the hard way or the easy way, choose 2

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The brilliance in the movie, It’s a wonderful life is that the angel creates a thought experiment: what the world would be like if our hero hadn’t been born.

Thought experiments are uniquely human: animals can’t do thought experiments. Continue reading “Learning lessons the hard way or the easy way, choose 2”

But what about fear? What shall I do if I am always afraid?

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Alexander the Great supposedly said:

Through every generation of the human race there has been a constant war, a war with fear. Those who have the courage to conquer it are made free and those who are conquered by it are made to suffer until they have the courage to defeat it, or death takes them.

Now, looking at it from the viewpoint of the fixed mindset versus the growth mindset you can see that the fixed mindset promises you to keep you safe. Continue reading “But what about fear? What shall I do if I am always afraid?”

Coming from vs Going to: you’ve always been going to

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Summary: from the comments and email I am getting it is clear that the concept of starting with HAPPY is totally inconceivable to most of you. In my response to a comment I managed to express the essence of it: It is like the skin color you have, it is part of you.

In the ‘HAPPY’ I advocate, where you start with HAPPY, stay HAPPY, end HAPPY.

It’s not a result. It is who you are.

You do what needs to get done to grow, and you are HAPPY while doing it. You are not ‘happy’ to do it, that would be something else again. You are HAPPY, just like you don’t change your skin color according to the type of task you do in life. You stay white, or pink, or yellow, or black… whatever you started with.

It is as if you said ‘I am white’ if you were born white. And then you live according to that.’ Continue reading “Coming from vs Going to: you’ve always been going to”

Curiosity, hunger, appetite, are you killing them all?

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Curiosity… Hunger… appetite… sexual desire…are you killing them all?

Your parents, your teachers told you: don’t eat candy, don’t eat cookies before dinner: it will kill your appetite.

The five ‘hardware-type’ needs, the need for energy supply, information, safety, reproduction and group are guided by feelings… all a lot like hunger.

Hunger can be fulfilled with empty calories or good, nourishing food.

The need, the second most vital need is the hunger for information. We also call that curiosity. You can fulfill it, just like the first one, with junk. Continue reading “Curiosity, hunger, appetite, are you killing them all?”

Why you do what you do, why you don’t do what you don’t do?

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There are two types of students and there are two types of teachers.

Teacher One says: I’ll teach you!
Teacher Two says: I won’t quit until you learned it!

Student One says: I’ll come to your class, I’ll pay for your program and then I’ll try!
Student Two says: I’ll do whatever it takes to make sure I learn it and have it for myself. Continue reading “Why you do what you do, why you don’t do what you don’t do?”

The end of having to fix what’s wrong is nigh

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Why wouldn’t we want to fix what’s wrong?

Because nothing is wrong. It is what it is, it is how it is, and it is just a phase, it is just a place, it is just how it is, for now.

I am sure you are asking yourself: has she finally gone completely insane?

But I have always been like this… because this is the only place where you can be happy, growing, doing what you want to do… when nothing is wrong. Continue reading “The end of having to fix what’s wrong is nigh”

Your complaints: What is the source of your misery?

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I have been pondering a student’s email all morning.

Today I was observing as the machine isn’t interested in going through a process to win: it prefers winging it… Go directly to the top, or zig-zag… with no rhyme and reason.

And then… suddenly, uninvited, a series of connected memories surfaced.

The the captivating story of a 13 year old killing his abusive father, becoming a cross-dresser… pondering if homosexuality is genetic, or imprinted (brain plasticity). I think about the Royals’ sexual behavior. I think about the beautiful enchantress becoming pockmarked from smallpox… to yet another movie’s heroine, face marred with smallpox… rejected by many, and accepted by the one she loved.

And at that I cried.

The insight: the crying, came from a ‘wrong’ I experienced as a child. Continue reading “Your complaints: What is the source of your misery?”