Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

If you feel like I have slighted you, can you learn from me?

I had a cat a decade or so ago. Her name was Kiki. She had a relationship with me that was very similar to my clients’ relationship with me.

I could say love and hate, but it would be a lie.
I could say need and resentment… that is the closest I can get to wording what was the essence.

My cat was a stray kitten when I adopted her. I already had another cat, a huge tomcat. But occasionally I invited the tiny and scrawny kitten to eat. She ran in and ran out several times. Took a bite and then ran. I guess to make sure that she wasn’t imprisoned. Continue reading “If you feel like I have slighted you, can you learn from me?”

Seeing process: the ratcheting power of success

One of the concepts that none of my students have gotten before is process. Until now.

And maybe when she shares what she sees you’ll be able to see what you haven’t seen before. Whether you are a student of mine or just a reader.

This is from a student of mine. She has been in training for nine months. It’s taken that long to reach the state where she is ready for ‘step 1’ as she calls it. Continue reading “Seeing process: the ratcheting power of success”

I started to read my one non-fiction book of the quarter.

This morning I started to read my one non-fiction book for the quarter. John Carlton’s The Entrepreneur’s Guide To Getting Your Shit Together

I wish I have read it a decade or two ago. It would have made a huge difference.

It brought to light a ‘delusional’ worldview I have, where I expect people to do what I would do.

I’d never realized, and I am in shock. I am mortified, and it is, sometimes, too late, even though it’s not over till the fat lady sings. But I think it may be too late for me, but it is not too late for you.

So I am sharing it, even though I look bad… I am OK with that. Continue reading “I started to read my one non-fiction book of the quarter.”

If your life is a ‘no matter what I do’ life… listen up

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Most lives are like that… never really getting from A to B…

I just read something really profound that can change your life.

Don’t think about being consistently great. It’s a trap. It’s impossible. Think about being great at being consistent. It’s a reliable path to growth and achieving one’s potential that makes a lot more sense.

Replace ‘great’ with whatever you are weak at…

One of my students invented herself being excellent… and it has proven to be harmful. It acted like a straitjacket she needed to escape from. Continue reading “If your life is a ‘no matter what I do’ life… listen up”

Inventing oneself… the subtraction way of sculpting

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At or after your original incident, you invented yourself first.

In fact, most people invented themselves many times… creating themselves as a layer cake.

I am not a baker. My mother didn’t have a working oven until I was about 10… maybe that’s why I never warmed to cookies and cakes.

But I am a brick mason… and bricks are laid much like the layers of a cake. If the previous layer was crooked, the wall will be crooked, and maybe it will even fall down.

The created self is crooked. Each layer tells a story that doesn’t quite fit with the other layers. Continue reading “Inventing oneself… the subtraction way of sculpting”

Are you stingy with yourself? Do you say you don’t deserve?

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Are you stingy with yourself? Do you say you don’t deserve?

You may be. And you may be right.

One of the obvious signs of stinginess with yourself is that you don’t give yourself enough time to do what there is to do, enough time so you could actually ENJOY what you are doing.

I call this ‘homework attitude’, where you are more interested in checking an activity off your todo list than actually doing it, enjoying it, savoring it.

And to no one’s surprise, you can do everything with this homework stingy attitude. Sex. Conversations. Dinner. Reading. And, of course, the 67 steps. Continue reading “Are you stingy with yourself? Do you say you don’t deserve?”

A house divided against itself cannot stand

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A house divided against itself cannot stand, said Abraham Lincoln, invoking a biblical truth.

Congruence = agreement or harmony; compatibility. Congruent = in agreement or harmony.

Pretense, lying, you and your actions not saying the same thing leads to no success.

An inner division, lack of integrity, lack of authenticity is the main reason you are not successful, because your energies are divided and fight against each other, instead of using that same energy to get things done. To accomplish. To produce.

Criminals are happier than you. Hitmen are happier than you.

You need to decide who you are… and stick with your decision. In words and in action.

Continue reading “A house divided against itself cannot stand”

From my correspondence: what would Sophie do?

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Hi Sophie,

I’m still here in the thick of these holidays, holiday that I don’t even like. Still visiting friends. Having house guests. Feeling myself become more and more discombobulated.

I started to feel myself beginning to panic the way I used to. Thinking ‘I’m falling behind!‘. ‘I want to get back to my 67 steps!‘. ‘Sophie will wonder where I disappeared to!‘. ‘my vibration is sinking!‘. ‘I am out of my routine, the sky is falling!‘

I had to stop myself and consider, ‘what would Sophie do?‘ Continue reading “From my correspondence: what would Sophie do?”

All people are stingy but don’t know it…

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All people are stingy but don’t know it. (stingy: unwilling to give or spend; ungenerous)

Why? Because when you say stingy, you also need to specify what way. How. What they are not willing to give, reciprocate, provide, spend or invest in, because that is what they are stingy with.

And unless you know what lands as stingy in the world, for another, you cannot change it because, I think, you are justified.

You don’t have enough. You don’t see that it is necessary. Or it would render you below another… somehow. Continue reading “All people are stingy but don’t know it…”

If you are not Jewish, can you learn receiving? aka Kabbalah

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My article teaching the strategy of getting out of a deep ditch hit the spot for some people.

Here is one answer I got:

I found your article very helpful with the steps to get out of a catastrophe. I am also beginning to see the original incident and how its been playing out.

Since the original incident I’ve wanted to be liked so badly that I could not say no to the salesperson – I did not want to make her mad at me. I wanted all the things she promised to happen so that others would like me too. And for some reason, because she said others were successful with the [product], I took it as a challenge in a way. In the original incident I must have said that they – my parents – don’t like me. I am still looking. I don’t think I hit the sentence quite right – but it seems close.

Thank you for helping me. When I read it was the undertow – I knew I wasn’t crazy.

Continue reading “If you are not Jewish, can you learn receiving? aka Kabbalah”