Get out of your own way… what? why? how?

If life isn’t turning out the way you hoped… consider that you are in the way… Something about you… most likely in the invisible…

In this article we’ll look at some ways… it is not one way… not as simple as most say it is. There are five trillion pages saying ‘get out of your own way’ and and none of them goes below the visible… ugh.

I just read an article… It claims to be about Gen Z…

Gen-Z Has a Bad Case of “Main Character Syndrome”
Young people are pretending to be the protagonists in the movie version of their lives Continue reading “Get out of your own way… what? why? how?”

She killed her daughter and her grandson…

relationship This article is about relating… relationship…

…and what can go wrong, what always goes wrong with relationships… And how the same things could go right with just a little thought… Everything the internet says is shallow, surface, and cheap… instead I suggest distinctions.

I live in a two-family home. I live upstairs. This apartment used to be the owner’s… when their kids got too big, they bought another house and started to rent both apartments.

I know the owner, I know his wife, and I know that people in this street still remember how they used to fight, cats and dogs, scream loud enough for everyone to hear.

Now his daughter is renting the downstairs apartment…. Continue reading “She killed her daughter and her grandson…”

Getting along without giving up who you are…

getting along without giving up who you areGetting along, working along, creating side by side is very hard… often hopeless. This article points to the right way that you can learn to get along… and have harmonious relationships.

Some of my students are working on distinguishing conflict… Telling conflict apart from everything that looks like, and maybe even feels like a conflict.

For decades I pondered why the Greek sages said ‘Know Thyself‘. What difference does it make if I know myself or not.

And I wasn’t alone. Approximately 99% of humanity knows themselves to a maximum of 1%, which is as if they don’t know themselves at all.

In my Starting Point Measurements I measure this as ‘self-awareness.’

So in the absence of knowing your self, you make up a self… and that I call your ‘precious I’. Who you should be… not who you are. Continue reading “Getting along without giving up who you are…”

Can you tell when you are lied-to, when someone is fibbing?

Are you lied-to?Are you being lied-to?

I get guidance. I ‘obey’ guidance.

Guidance is not a full blown sentence, just a nudge. And often it is so that what I am supposed to see is down many days, many weeks, and I need to trust. I am supposed to do what the guidance says I am to do. Do it in spite of the fact that I have significant price to pay. It is mostly paying with the quality of my sleep, or having unendurable pain, or losing a lot of money.

I am not complaining. I signed up for this, after all.

Here is the newest.

I don’t know how many millions watched the show I was asked to watch by the guidance. How many millions watched and came up with any learning… Probably very few. Continue reading “Can you tell when you are lied-to, when someone is fibbing?”

A distinction not many would recognize…

distinction This distinction is called perpetration-withhold.

I have a new friend who lives walking distance from me. I can see her house and driveway from my office window, or could, but in the summer there is a stretch of dense woods between us, with wildlife… Continue reading “A distinction not many would recognize…”

How is responsibility the key to power? Real power…

Responsibility: if it is to be it is up to meAs usual, I am going to take the scenic route… I hope you’ll walk it with me, and get the enormous power of responsibility in causing yourself to have a life you can love.

Let’s start with looking at the word: Mentality

The word mentality is a lot similar to attitude, but while attitude is emotional, mentality is like a narrative, a whole story about how life should be, how people should be, how it was pre-ordained, who you are supposed to be, how you are supposed to be… blah blah blah.

By the way, narrative is the story you tell yourself, the explanation of life, your actions, of how you feel and why. It can change over time.

reality, occurrence, narrativeIf you are one of my students, it is the right circle… while the left circle, what happened, can remain unchanged, every person has a different narrative, explanation, comment, story, meaning about it. Continue reading “How is responsibility the key to power? Real power…”

Wake Up From your Employee Mentality, passenger mentality

employee mentalityI read this great article on mentality by the Note taking Nerds. The article is six years old, but it is evergreen… you’ll see.

The most important element of this article is this:

How you do anything is how you do everything… meaning:

Your mentality regarding everything in life is the same as your mentality is or would be to business, or to work.

The principles of owning and conducting a business also apply to conducting your life… You can read an benefit from reading this article whether you own a business, want a business, have a job, or don’t even have a job… because everyone who is alive is ‘conducting’ their lives… Owning your life is much like suddenly getting access to the steering wheel of the prison transport… and taking yourself where you want to go, not where you are already heading.

95% of business owners were employees before they started their own business. Me too. I was a horrible employee, by the way.

If you want to guarantee that you fail in business, approach it the same way you’ve approached all the jobs you’ve ever had. (Hm, interesting. I approached all my jobs that they were mine… not theirs. From one job I was fired 14 times, but I wasn’t willing to let go: it was MY job, not theirs, so they had no power over me. Not a frequent and usual way to look at a job, is it?) Continue reading “Wake Up From your Employee Mentality, passenger mentality”

What is the meaning of life? What is the purpose of life?

the purpose of lifeThe big question every philosophy, every society, every religion concerns itself with and comes up with a different answer: what is the purpose of life.

And depending on what they, what you come up with, your life is going to be happy, productive, or unhappy, full of pain and dissatisfaction.

We could safely say that…

…this could be the linchpin upon which the quality of your life depends.

So let’s look what purposes people have come up over the ages, I am quoting from various sites: Continue reading “What is the meaning of life? What is the purpose of life?”

Are you managing time, energy or results? how is it going?

getting things done. become a producer We all have the same amount of time, 24 hours a day, and yet some people get more stuff done in that time than others. Getting things done makes you a producer… and that is a superpower.

People with more accomplishments have a secret. I am going to share this secret with you.

I had this secret, but truth be told, it was a secret hidden from me too until about an hour ago. Continue reading “Are you managing time, energy or results? how is it going?”

Life should be different? you should be different?

If you live like life should be different…

Two basic components of my teaching: 1. we live in a pretend world, how the world should be, and 2. we’re pissed that the pretense isn’t real.

I watch what articles, what emails get read. And I have noticed that when the title isn’t saying what it should say about you: smart, clever, good, blah blah blah, you don’t want to read the article. Or the email.

Or if you are a client: If I say something about you that I shouldn’t say… you cry ‘bloody murder’, or you may even quit.

What I said didn’t fit the pretend world you live in…

If you prefer new to old and tried, if you prefer going wide than going deep, if you prefer many friends to having one close friend, then… Continue reading “Life should be different? you should be different?”