Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

The most frequent type of envy can be expressed with “how come they can/have/got X and I don’t?”

How come they succeeded and I don’t. How come they got the promotion and I didn’t. How come they have a nice partner and I don’t. How come they are thin and I am fat? How come they get the results and I don’t? How come, how come, how come… What am I, chopped liver?

And more often than not, the answer is: “Because they do what you don’t.”

When you are the one who is slighted, how didn’t, can’t, don’t have, or didn’t get X, it is near impossible to see what it is the THEY do that you don’t.

One of my areas of didn’t, can’t, don’t have, or didn’t get X has something to do with being liked.

Not many people like me. It used to be better, and it used to be worse.

In Hungary I had friends, I had fans. I only had problems with authority: I never got a raise, never was promoted, and I was widely unpopular by the top brass of the companies I worked for.

Then between ages 34 and 64, 30 years, OMG! I was mostly alone. I only talked to people when I was giving them something, mostly stuff that they would have to pay for. I begged them to take it. I wanted to buy my way into friendship.

The past two years it’s been nicer.
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How come some people get results and other don’t, when they do a program?

reticular-activating-system-function The easy and obvious answer would be that some do the work of the program, others don’t.

But what if neither do the work? And yet, some have results, and other don’t.

What is the explanation? Are the “some” smarter?

The answer is is your reticular activator.

The reticular activator works for you behind the scenes

The reticular activator function is an attention function. It is also a pattern recognizing, zeroing in function, much like a heat seeking missile: it cannot miss. It is a function that below your conscious awareness gets the work done for you.

Your attitude to the program either works with your reticular activator or it doesn’t. And that largely depends on your attitude about yourself.
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Your emotional baseline and your chances for success

I read a very interesting article ¹ today. It is about being able to predict from how you were as a baby and toddler your chances for success, your chances for being smart, your chances for aberrant, deviant behavior, like crime or addictions.

And although most of you, if you read it, will be resigned to how you turned out, or alternatively argue till you are hoarse with the predictions, there is a more constructive way to read the article: get guidance.

Of course, if you are already having trouble in life, you are habitually relating to everything as a good reason to get depressed, turn to the bottle, get angry, or eat more m&m’s, but if you are not quite there, there is the guidance I recommend that you get:

All of those signs you demonstrated as a toddler are correctable by the Bach Flower Energies.

If you have a propensity for being impatient, wanting immediate gratification, not being able to hang in there and do what you need to do even if it is tedious, or unsuccessful at the moment, the Bach Flower Energy Impatience will increase your capacity for more patience, so you can actually get something done, learn something, hang in there.
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Want to be happy? here are the steps

Happiness is a function of accepting what is. Life is like this weird rose… doesn’t look the way it should… orderly, smooth, safe, winning, beautiful, etc… Hard to accept, hard to even tolerate… Right?

What is accepting what is?

Accepting is saying yes to. You could also say: when you are accepting something, you give it permission to be exactly the way it is, and not be what it isn’t.

There is no “it should be different”, and there is no “it should not be” or “should not be the way it is.”
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If it is easy, it probably won’t do you any good!

I had an insight today that will open up a can of worms…

I have had issues with my weight since age 9. I have found effective ways to manage my weight, apart from starving myself (I did that for about 15 years too…), one of them involves a breathing technique.

I did that method for about three years, first to reduce my weight and then to maintain it, without having to change my diet.

It worked like gangbusters… and I was surprised to hear that the originator of the method was sued, in a class action suit, that the method didn’t work.

She lost the suit, and paid millions in restitution.
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Fear is an opportunity to summon courage…

Most of us treat fear as a valid indication, a valid guidance of what we should avoid.

Others never consciously experience fear.

I have done the “what’s missing” exercise this morning, while still in bed, in my head. I saw that what was missing that would make a difference in my life, right now, is courage.

Then I proceeded doing my day the way I have been doing it for the past month or so: No fear.

Then I had the thought that the fear we are talking about in the title only comes when we attempt something that is new, that has an uncertain outcome, where there is some choice.
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REALMeditation: why and how should you meditate

The purpose of meditation is to be able to live in the present, powerfully. That is to say: not an experience, some some mystical “meditation experience” like you thought it would be. Meditation experience, if any, is the booby prize… and many fall into that trap… Clear indication that they went into some la-la-land, half-asleep, all mind-induced. I have students like this, they are miserable in their lives.

The purpose of meditation is to be able to live in the present, powerfully… and be happy, joyful, fulfilled… and all that lovely stuff you say you want. Continue reading “REALMeditation: why and how should you meditate”

Baby Steps To Big Big Dreams. Baby steps?

Note: I adapted this post using a salesy email I got this morning… I liked the questions… not the product… If it sounds a little bit salesy… I apologize. That was not my intention.

It is time to be brutally honest with yourself… just like spring cleaning, Passover cleaning, etc. You need to do a cleaning of your house at least once a year…

If life has lost its taste.
If life has gone hum-drum.
If you stopped really enjoying what is supposed to be enjoyable.
If the people in your life lost their beauty.
If food is only there to be eaten… but really who cares.
If you have become dutiful, duty-bound. If it is an effort.
If blessed sleep is valued more than your awake hours.
If being with yourself has become something to run away from.

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How to know yourself? The sideways glance

Knowing yourself well is vitally important when you want to interact with reality powerfully.

What’s in the way of you knowing yourself well?

Illusions, delusions, flattery, comparison, arrogance, I could continue this list for a whole page.

So given that so many things are in the way, blocking or distorting your view, how do you get to know yourself? Continue reading “How to know yourself? The sideways glance”

Money, success, love, hunger, greed desire, want?

I am becoming clearer and clearer that one of the reasons you may not produce the results in your life, with my teachings, because you don’t understand the words, and you just nod, as if you did. At least that is my experience both on all my calls… so you are probably not an exception.

If looking up the word produces unsatisfying results, then please make sure you ask me in the comments section: I will make sure I explain all the words that don’t make sense. OK?

Here are a few that have come up lately as not understood:
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