Become all you can become by raising yourself higher on the Tree of Life

What a nice cup of coffee has to do with having a Self?

How much voice do YOU have in the chorus of the voices that live in your head?

It’s Thursday morning, and I am starting a new experiment.

Yesterday I discovered that I have no idea what it is like to eat when you have an appetite. I observed myself, and I solely eat, have been eating, for taste. Texture. The mouthfeel.

But my physiology wants me to eat for appetite. ¹ Bummer, I don’t know the first thing about appetite… 🙁
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I look at different languages to get a clue… In Hungarian appetite, the word, says “the desire to eat”. Hm. In other languages there are appetizers… that grow that desire to eat, or maybe to wake up the dormant desire? Continue reading “What a nice cup of coffee has to do with having a Self?”

Why getting well is so difficult for us…

There is never a better time to experience what you experience, than right when you experience it.

This morning I was hit with a strong feeling of despair, loneliness.

I didn’t have time to hang out with it, I was in the middle of something. I wanted to shoo it away, and I also wanted to indulge in it.

But then I decided to just feel it, acknowledge it, and let it go. I paid attention to what it said… nodded, wept a little, and let it go. ²

Is this familiar to you? I didn’t think so. You don’t know who you are, and you don’t want to find out.

There are many reasons you don’t know yourself.

One of these reasons is that you resist your emotions.

Continue reading “Why getting well is so difficult for us…”

Is cheerfulness good for you? Is it a virtue?

This article was inspired by an Aeon.co article against cheerfulness as a virtue

cheerfulness: noticeably happy and optimistic.
causing happiness by its nature or appearance.

I am taking that concept to its conclusion… So here we go…

The mantra of the world-class thinker is: “I am responsible.”

That quote is from Mentally Tough leader, Steve Siebold…

I get his one-sentence emails, and I read them. They are all wakeup calls, and they are all telling me the many ways your TLB, Twitchy Little Bastard score manifests.

I teach that the most valuable ability, capacity, aspiration, maybe even virtue is to interact with reality.

Continue reading “Is cheerfulness good for you? Is it a virtue?”

Always misjudged, misunderstood? No one sees your genius?

Are you always misjudged, misunderstood, or mistreated? No one can see how bright you are?

The art of being heard, being known the right way

On one of the webinars the topic was “Not being heard… Being misunderstood”

Every person on the call had at least one painful childhood incident where their speaking wasn’t getting for them what they intended to get, instead their speaking was earning them grief and heart ache.

They wanted appreciation, understanding, equality, or love, validation, significance, or at least agreement.

When something doesn’t work, one would expect, next time you’ll try something different. But no… in real life it seems that the more something doesn’t work, the more you, humans are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

When we looked, each and every one of us were repeating and repeating and repeating the incident in our lives, the same way, expecting a different result. Insanity, right? Continue reading “Always misjudged, misunderstood? No one sees your genius?”

Are you inspirable? Can you even be inspired?

Inspiration… what is it and why do you want to have it?

Inspiration, breathing life into inert or unconscious matter… is the difference between a machine and a Man…

An inspired action, an inspired life, an inspired person is vastly different from most people, most actions, most lives on the planet. How? in that what guides those is what is beyond the 10% reality, and beyond the emotional dramatic interpretation. And beyond the meaning based lives humans live nowadays. Continue reading “Are you inspirable? Can you even be inspired?”

Get out of your mind and take control of your life

Getting out of the mind is easy to do, hard to teach…

Mainly because the words are misleading: you don’t want to control your mind, you can’t. You want to control and direct your attention. Your mind is not controllable… But your attention is.

Once you get the hang of it… have an experience outside of your mind, life starts to open up.

The trick is not to try to change your thoughts… that would still trap you in the mind. Or change your fear… or change your desire… or change anything.

What works is to take your attention off the mind and put it on something, anything, in the present. My favorite is to download the Heaven on Earth and follow the path of the energy bundle through the 40 stops. It goes slowly, and it does work on all the 40 locations in the body: removing blockages, one after the other. I don’t remember where I teach the stops… so I may have to recreate it… I’ll add it to this post. Email me if you want it.

Another way to move your attention off the mind is to do the “find your feet” exercise… search the site to find it… I share it in some other article.

A third way is to start examining minutely your hand… you can even do that while you talk to someone, or listen to a lecture…

What is wrong with the mind-control type of teachings?

1. the mind-control teachings, the teachings that say: control your mind? After all they say that if you can control your mind, you can achieve anything…
2. And the Law of Attraction teachers/fans say: if you hold the image in your mind, and hold onto it long enough, it will happen…
3. And the Positive Thinking people say: if you can turn everything into its opposite, or just avoid saying anything negative, you’ll be happy, and blah blah blah…

Continue reading “Get out of your mind and take control of your life”

Why unconditional love is damaging but what is loving?

Why unconditional love is damaging, and why setting conditions is healthy… even loving?

My new 20-day skill learning challenge is to listen and internalize 20 videos by Hungarian, now dead, psychologist, Peter Popper.

Why am I doing this challenge? What will this give me?

I am self-taught… or more precisely: I have an education that is hodge podge, eclectic: I gathered knowledge from all over the place, and I have gaping holes, that until this day I had no idea where to fill or how.

The gaping holes are so big, that some of my students could slip through: Whatever I knew didn’t help them to become all they can become.

With that said, I listened to a Dr. Popper masterclass on youtube, sadly, it is in Hungarian, with subtitles that you need to set to your own language…

Dr Popper’s masterclasses, a whole lot of them, have 60% truth value, 30% of what he says fills in my gaping holes. Continue reading “Why unconditional love is damaging but what is loving?”

From Que Sera Sera, a meandering path to no regrets

I left Hungary 37 years ago. And yet, when I hum, half of the songs are Hungarian, from before I left there.

I trust that when a song pops into my head, it is some kind of guidance. So when the song that was somehow related to the Counter-revolution in 1956, Que sera sera sung in Hungarian, when that song popped into my mind, I said to myself: pay attention. What is it saying?

I was nine years old at the time, and I was puzzled why the song would be put on the black list… I still can’t see why.

I am doing a little research on google. Continue reading “From Que Sera Sera, a meandering path to no regrets”

Invisible Dynamic: Undeclared commitments

My horoscope often tells me what I should be dealing with, either for myself, or for you and me.

This is the horoscope I received in my email box today, from Rob Brezsny:

If you were a snake, it would be a fine time to molt your skin. If you were a river, it would be a perfect moment to overflow your banks in a spring flood. If you were an office worker, it would be an excellent phase to trade in your claustrophobic cubicle for a spacious new niche. In other words, you are primed to outgrow at least one of your containers. The boundaries you knew you would have to transgress (step over the boundary, infringe or go beyond the bounds of) some day are finally ready to be transgressed. Even now, your attention span is expanding and your imagination is stretching.

Obviously he uses the word ‘transgress’ to express that you are in some self imposed prison, he calls it container. Rob Brezsny is a typical California positive language dude… not a straight talk dude, like myself.

Now, whether it is addressed to me, or whether it is addressed to us, I am going to attend to both aspect.

The first thing to examine where it is where ‘we’, you and me, consider certainty, security, knowing more comfortable than stretching.
Continue reading “Invisible Dynamic: Undeclared commitments”

Learning to learn… how you learn makes all the difference… What is the theta state of mind?

Some days I just can’t write. I don’t want to write.

Some days it doesn’t make any sense to me to write. It feels like I have done all I will ever do, and it hasn’t made a difference.

One of the main stumbling block for me to being able to make a difference for you, is how you listen.

You listen with a certain economy. You want to make sure that what you hear is relevant, what you hear is true, what you hear is worth listening to.

How do you make the decision what to FOCUS on?

You go to the only place you have: your mind.

The mind is a storage facility. I contains all the things you have put, consciously or unconsciously, into it. Continue reading “Learning to learn… how you learn makes all the difference… What is the theta state of mind?”