Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

There are two ways to hear anything Part 2. What was said and what you heard…

I have been observing people’s behavior in seminars, coaching calls, and even one-on-one conversations.

They are rarely hearing what you are saying. 1

Do what do they do?

  • 1. they get hooked on something you said, and now they are in their minds, having a totally different conversation… a conversation wholly independent from what you are talking about.
  • 2. they are arguing with you in their heads… don’t agree, don’t like, don’t own.
  • 3. they have checked out… they are as good as asleep.

I have seen this third one in various courses and seminars.

When the topic goes to something that is unconfrontable, difficult, would take courage or intelligence to follow… something that is contrary to their worldview… people check out. They may fall asleep… especially men.

These is the main reason why I rarely offer one-on-one talk type coaching:…

Continue reading “There are two ways to hear anything Part 2. What was said and what you heard…”

The Law of 33%, and why you resist it? tooth and nail

One of the brilliant ideas from the 67 steps that hardly anyone considers as applying to them is the idea of spending at least one third of their discretionary time

Discretionary time is time you have control over, time you can call your own.  I have found that it could be as high as two hours, but as a minimum, an hour a day is necessary if you want to grow. You’ll train your TLB with this too… because being with people who are better than you is NOT comfortable… actually it can be very painful. Continue reading “The Law of 33%, and why you resist it? tooth and nail”

Negotiation, enrollment, differences of opinion, arguments

Dear Sophie:

I just watched this interview with the author of “Never Split the Difference.” It’s a book about negotiation techniques. The author is a former FBI hostage negotiator. I found it quite intriguing. My head was spinning just trying to keep up with the conversation. Afterwards, I was left with very mixed feelings. It seemed to me that my desire to learn more about these techniques was rooted in greed and a sense of wanting to learn in order to win or manipulate. Whatever the feeling, I am not comfortable with it; it was not a pure feeling. I have a different idea about communication, one having to do with connection, more along the lines of Steven Covey, ” Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood,” and Dale Carnegie, and the Communication Course. Maybe I misread the author (without having read the book). Maybe my aversion to learning negotiating techniques is related to my resistance to A is A. I am curious to know the truth value of the material and the intention behind it.
Continue reading “Negotiation, enrollment, differences of opinion, arguments”

What one thing you want to learn from Babe Ruth

Make your plane land where you want it to land… or what one thing you want to learn from Babe Ruth

This is probably the most shocking sentence in the whole 67 step program.

I literally don’t know anyone who lives that way.

People try to succeed, try a diet, try this and try that… while their plane crashes in every area.

So what is the difference between who are like that, who are on their way to become that kind of person, and others who never ever land their plane on the landing strip? Continue reading “What one thing you want to learn from Babe Ruth”

Your life and principles… Ask: To what end? What life you want to have had on your deathbed?

This article is stream of consciousness… I apologize for that.

Principles 2 are tricky. Depending on your level of vibration, on the size of your cone of vision, on the number and size of patterns you can see, you’ll translate the principle down to your size.

A principle says something to me, and another thing to you.

And yet, being guided by principles, your results in life will be happier than if you choose to live your life from vague longings, goals, or following how the ones went before you lived their lives. Continue reading “Your life and principles… Ask: To what end? What life you want to have had on your deathbed?”

Shall I become popular, or shall I choose to do the work

Shall I become popular, or shall I choose to do the work no one else can do but needs to be done? You either do one or the other…

I am still looking at how to become an influencer… 3

It’s not really my ambition… 4 I am much more comfortable doing my thing and barely be noticed. But it seems that in today’s day and age, unless you do a lot of hoopla, loud, self-promotion, partnering up with high visibility people, and other fashionable strategies, becoming an influencer is impossible.

I am still looking if I really want to become an influencer or not.

I learned about becoming an influencer from Tai’s free video on trend stacking.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynAExlX21QU

 

A trend is, in this context, something that is becoming a fashion more and more. Something that has reached the masses and now they are jumping on the bandwagon. Popular…

My body is responding to this idea with massive indication that this is not my path. And yet…

And yet… increasing my sphere of influence, 5 even just doubling it would mean I can work with more people.

Judging from the past, each additional 100 people deliver, on average, one person who can and is willing to do the work to become worth a damn. Continue reading “Shall I become popular, or shall I choose to do the work”

Spiritual Practice: ask What is it that I am not seeing? It gets you out of the mind

Most things that hide in plain sight are crucial to your success in life. You may be staring at them, but like a color blind person looking at the colored dots that hide the number… you cannot see.
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Between you and me: you probably have never asked yourself “What is it I am not seeing?” have you?

Why don’t you ask, why don’t you don’t look?
  • If you think that you know everything: you won’t look.
  • If you think you see clearly what’s in front of you… you won’t look.

Continue reading “Spiritual Practice: ask What is it that I am not seeing? It gets you out of the mind”

A spiritual practice that can change improve everything

If you’ve bought into the b.s. that thinking good thoughts, happy thoughts, being non-judgmental is good for you, 7 then your vibration is low, but more importantly, your vibration cannot be raised, unless you let go of this b.s.

Let’s turn this baby on its head: if you bought into the b.s. that your thoughts create your reality, and you need to avoid thinking bad thoughts regarding yourself, the world, the future, other people, because it makes you and your life bad… then there is nothing I can ever do for you, unless you change your mind.

Why? Because you refuse to interact with reality, you refuse to base your actions on reality.

Reality is neither good nor bad, it is what it is.

Continue reading “A spiritual practice that can change improve everything”

Does life behave like a kayak or an automobile?

As I was answering a coaching student’s post on my Reclaim your life program, I had an insight.

The model you use to change your life, to make decision, to live your life is the model of the automobile.

Narrow streets, you make right angle turns, the motive power in the engine obeys your steering.

Life doesn’t work like an automobile. Life is a lot more like kayaking.

The way you adjust your direction is with tiny shifts of your paddle… no big moves are effective. Continue reading “Does life behave like a kayak or an automobile?”