Why is rape so traumatic, while sex is so commonplace?- Why is slave labor so traumatic, while working is so natural to us.
If you have ever been pinned down, not able to free yourself…
If you have ever been forced to do something you didn’t want to do… anything…
…your trust of life, your trust in people, your confidence has dealt a big blow.
Recovering is not guaranteed, and the wound can be torn open again quite easily.
Rape, forcing, slavery violates our fundamental right for free choice, for self-determination. I think this is what is called “human rights”.
Different levels of this slavery are in nearly everyone’s life.
If your parents, rarity!, did allow you to grow along the specific lines your genes and soul correction blueprint defined, then the school, the church, the “superior” race or other people forced you.
I am yet to talk to someone who didn’t have this experience.
I had one of these yesterday, and I am still weeping. My natural reaction to something I don’t know how to deal with. It’s healing.
Allowing the tears to flow counters the machine-like desire to shut down, to retreat, to disappear… or the violence, the revenge. So I am weeping for now.
My eyes are weeping, my hands can type.
Having had this experience, and having the capacity of seeing patterns, I am seeing this phenomenon in other places.
Slavery. Fear and force… you’ll be punished if you claim your freedom, freedom of choice, freedom to go wherever you want to go.
Being Black in a white world, and seeing no patterns 1 result in a belligerent Black population. Not weeping, but reacting, shutting down, retreating, vengeance.
Tyranny.
Freedom means: nothing is forcing you against your better judgment. You are free to choose.
When the trauma of rape or enslavement never got resolved, your life is lived out of the tyranny of vengeance, the tyranny of fear, the tyranny of resentment.
Things happen. It is your responsibility to release the violent energy, sublimate it, so it won’t claim your life.
Freedom means: you can choose your approach.
I had an interaction with a student that rocked my world.
You see, a coach never knows what words, which words will cause the floodgates to open, which words will unstuck you.
A student wrote (in Reclaim) :
I’m limiting myself right now. I need to kick the wall down. I just think I am scared to see what is on the other side and go into the unknown of what is there. Even when I have kicked a hole in the wall and make a change anywhere I usually patch it back up and revert back to where I was. Maybe I am scared that there is more to me and resisting change. It’s time for change I’m playing a small game and it’s no fun anymore.I want to be more to see more.
My answer in my laconic, cryptic style:
Wanting is a lie.
try a different approach
You see, telling people what to do, how to think, connects to their minds… not my intention. The stupid mind isn’t going to be useful… “looking” will.
What if I were to focus on the impact I am having now instead of where I’m (with what I want), to see the value in each job and not to look at it as a job to do but what value the job is doing for customer. So instead of wanting I could focus on how can I create more value, not only for me but for other people. I’m not sure if this makes sense I might have to look into this more I think creating more is possibly where I’m going with this instead of wanting more.
my answer:
creating more value is a great context instead of wanting more
and the flowering
I’m sure I have wanted my whole life. I like the context of creating. I have never even looked at doing this. I’m going to try this on and start causing things to happen instead of waiting and wanting for things to happen. This could be huge for me to flip this for a new way of approaching life.
Can you sense, smell, feel freedom’s wind blowing?
It’s a process. You get to freedom through fully exhausting the futile ways of slavery.
Slavery to anger, slavery to fear, slavery to whatever you are a slave to.
I was a slave to wanting vengeance for my suffering, for the injustice, for all the things I wasn’t allowed.
When I was willing to let go, after some 50 years, life opened up to me.
I have done it once, and can do it again. My back is still tight, my teeth want to grind. I am ready. I’ll allow my physiology to catch up when it’s ready.
I prefer to cause my life, instead of reacting to what others actions and attitudes could cause it to be.
