What is the relationship between skills, learning new skills, and capacities?
All my life I have been puzzled why perfectly normal people fail at even understanding concepts from certain things, like distinctions, from communication, negotiation, empathy, caring, team work, leadership, responsibility… I could fill this page with examples.
I have had my own issues. One of them is understanding instructions if there is even just one word in the instructions I am not exactly clear what it means, or what the writer means, I can’t follow the instructions.
This is probably why, last week, I could not make the first computer I bought work: its one-page instructions sheet was written in a language I did not comprehend, and I didn’t trust myself to spend a year or so to learn those concepts so I can have the computer work.
I had to suspect that people I so confidently talk to, have a similar deficiency: they can’t make what I say work for them, because there are holes in the fabric of knowledge.
Then last year I tried to be helpful to a woman in Ireland (I even published our conversation to zero echo from readers!) by teaching her negotiation skills, empathy, looking at things from the other person’s point of view: methods that are obvious and easy for me. I was sure that other readers will love the article… I was wrong.
Negotiation is giving the other person what they want so you can get what you want. It is a very highly spiritual activity: you can’t do it with seven capacities. You have to be able to see that life is not an either/or phenomenon, that it is possible to give everyone what’s important to them. You have to know what is important to you, you have to know what is important to the other.
Strikes are low vibration: you resort to violence, you resorted to ultimatums. Low vibration, low capacities.
Now I have to admit that I have worked around a communication program for years, and watched people smarter than me not get, not able to perform the moves of communication that were easy for me.
But I never learn…
The woman in Ireland, seemingly willfully, refused to do any of the things I taught her. I was hurt. But something new, a thought process started in me…
She wrote to me today to ask for a negotiation course recommendation.
I muscletested and she has five spiritual capacities, also called life skills, working for her.
It dawned on me: unless you have the capacities activated in your DNA, the capacities that are needed to do the work, you can’t learn the work… can’t learn the skill.
It’s not an intellectual deficiency: it is a life-skill deficiency.
I got really lucky: I have a student who is on the autistic spectrum: autism is as varied as you can imagine, going from dyslexia to full-blown autism and no ability to live in society.
The student is a functioning autistic with one strong skill in one type of computer work. He had three life skills when we started to talk. But he wanted more out of life than what he was getting. He wanted human contact. (I wonder if many autistic people want that only can’t express it?)
I activated a few spiritual capacities for him. Some turned off right away, but some stayed on. The most dramatic were empathy and the capacity to be interested in what another is saying.
Now, let me return to the topic of skills, skill inventory.
If you are lucky, you have enough capacities and you have developed some skills those spiritual capacities allow you to have.
And if you are even luckier, your desire and your abilities work well together, so you don’t have to come crashing down, when you cannot learn a skill because it is based on capacities you don’t have.
I have found that even the task to keep capacities on, capacities I turn on for you, is beyond many of you.
Some capacities are more basic, and are closer to the capacities you have. You need capacities to activate capacities. You need capacities even to see what you are supposed to do with the new capacities.
A current example is the capacity of The Sight: seeing the consequences of your actions.
One client asked for that capacity. Then proceeded to send me long dissertations on what consequences his actions have, pro and con… much like a school project. Unfortunately what wasn’t there is “seeing”. Understanding, thinking, thinking it out… yeah. But seeing comes not from the mind, it comes from intuition.
The capacity of The Sight activates the intuition. If the recipient uses their mind to keep the capacity on…oh well… practicing the mind will not keep intuition on…
What was there, with this client, is a lack of understanding, and also a lack of humility: he thought he knew exactly what he was supposed to do.
Of course the capacity of The Sight turned off. And of course humility, the capacity to leave mind-knowledge at the door, is not active for this client.
Now, why am I writing these articles that tell you the truth, instead of making a quick buck getting everyone buy up all the capacities… whether they can use them or not?
Because I learned that without integrity nothing works. And I am important to me. I am selfish…
Are you?
PS: I am contemplating offering a package of four spiritual capacities with an exploratory conversation, much like the workshop I am no longer offering. The package would include support to keep on the capacities.
The most important aspect of this new approach is that I would be able to be responsible that you don’t get a capacity that is beyond what you can incorporate. And if I make a mistake, and I make mistakes, of course, then it is my problem to replace the dropped capacity with something you can hold onto.
I don’t have a price yet, I am thinking $250-$300 for the package.
The package idea is great. Getting help to pinpoint what’s missing and the support to keep the capacity turned on would be priceless.
I am glad you like it
Hi Sophie,
I really like this package idea, more personally tailored to the person, more support.
This is exciting.
thank you. It will allow me to control who can get it and who can’t, just like with one one one coaching.
No public link.