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Are YOU in your own way? Is that why you can’t grow, can’t learn, can’t amount to much.
Is that why you are always seeking, never finding? Why everyone is an a’hole, and you get angry and stew? Why you won’t even be looking to see?
Someone who has already gotten out of their way can have a good old time watching the zoo where humanity is the population.
[bctt tweet=”You get into your own way. You get into your own view of everything. And unfortunately you don’t know how to take yourself out of the picture.” username=”MavenPlatform”]
[bctt tweet=”Life isn’t about you. Even YOUR life isn’t about you… or if it is, you are more than likely to be miserable.” username=”MavenPlatform”]
When anything is about you, you are about as effective as a one legged person in an ass kicking contest. Or a one armed person in a hugging context. Not very… or not at all.
I just did a search on google, and on facebook for ‘get out of your way’ challenges.
Everyone has a lot to say… but like with everything, they are on the surface.
I’ll get back to what other people say… but for now, let’s stay with where and how, deep down, you interfere with yourself.
First, let’s look at how I measure to what degree you get into your own way. Not out… into your own way.
In the Starting Point Measurements the measure is #11. Your about-me score, also the inverted number of humility: %
Your about-me score is a filter. The number shows to what degree you include yourself into what you see…
So looking from that measurement’s perspective, reducing that number is what you are actually doing.
Back when I started my about-me number was 100%. Everything was about me… every damn thing. I was more miserable than miserable. lol.
Today my number is 3%. And that after something actually triggered that pesky ‘I, me, mine, myself’.
This dude I know has published books and never told me. He is on one hand self-satisfied, on the other hand needy, and utterly consumed by this ‘I, me, mine, myself’.
His about-me score is 100%. His authenticity is 0%.
So obviously nothing is about me. Or mine. And yet, that pesky 3% about-me score kicked in, I can still feel it! and doing its darned best to pull me in. The grab the reins of my life… and hijack it.
So how do I, how have I taken back the rein.
It has two steps: The first one is harder. The first step is to diagnose that you related to what happened, what somebody did as having ANYTHING to do with you.
Most things have nothing to do with you. Even being beaten up, or called named have nothing to do with you. They have everything to do with the ‘perpetrator’.
You were just there, as a punching bag…
And then, when you can see that YOU put yourself in the picture, then you can remove yourself.
Ultimately, until and unless you can remove your own significance, you’ll have a hard time removing yourself from any picture.
Of course to be able to see clearly, you’d need at least the one way to see aspect of The Sight capacity.
The Sight capacity has eight aspects, one of them is being able to see what’s happening from a third person perspective. I call that aspect the Driftwood… Without that you’ll never really see that you are not in the picture… You may be doing something in the picture, but never the way you saw it from inside your head.
Whether you are in the picture because you are ‘judge, jury, and executioner’ or because you consider yourself the victim, is immaterial. You dragged yourself into the picture, and you pay the price.
So what am I trying to say here?
When someone says: get out of your own way, they simply, at the root, say: take yourself out of the picture. Look from where you are obviously not in the picture.
So back to what others say should work:
I will just use one of the many ways others say should work:
Think Positive Thoughts
Ugh.
Can you? Can your word, your positive thoughts override your automatic about-me negative thought?
Never.
And no matter what advice you take, unless it says: get all the way to the root of this misery and disable that! you will just put chocolate covering on turd.
Success is not about you. Failure is not about you. Being afraid, being stopped, being anything is not about you.
I have found that as long as there is a you, you are in your own way.
I think that maybe all those people that have said it’s ego were right in this regard.
Ego is an energy. Not necessarily your friend, although in some cases it could be.
Ego says that there is a you, and it can be attacked.
Ego also seems to be saying that you can judge things, the world. That you can say something is wrong, and that makes it so.
That, instead of saying ‘it feels wrong’.
When you are the experiencer, the feeler, the Observer, the Witness, life begins to work without you putting the kibosh on it. Kibosh comes from the Irish… where killing is or was a national passtime. Where being the judge, jury, and executioner is most alive.
Why them? Why there? I don’t know and I don’t care.
Also, this doesn’t mean every Irish is a killer… only that the culture, the temperament, the mindset is that of a killer.
But let’s look at this phenomenon with sober eyes.
Ego says: react. React with words or react with action.
Ego seems to put you in the seat of ‘it’s about me’.
I have been calling it mind, because all the reactions are mind-stuff. No body stuff, no feelings, no power. Only the ‘flinging’ of power. You have the hook in your mouth and no freedom.
Do you see that removing the hook in your mouth is getting out of your own way?
When you can be the feeler, or the Observer, you are not in your own way.
The other day I was scheduled to lead a workshop. I felt really ill. I felt pain. It felt like it was trying to kill me.
But I felt it, and I was the feeler.
I opened the workshop, and waited for the participants.
One of them said that she felt terrible. I acknowledged her for coming anyway.
Want to listen in? It is a one-minute audio
It is the essence of TLB… of not being a Twitchy Little Bastard. You feel what you feel, and that has nothing to do with what you do… unless you explicitly and consciously set some feelings as a requirement for you to do something.
As I did in this conversation… same workshop, just a few minutes earlier.
But unless you move out of your mind, or egomind, you are not free to do what you need to do. You are not free to do what would take care of you, take care of life, get things done.
Unless you move out of egomind, you are still in a cage.
I am still not out of the egomind when it comes to bugs. To itching.
And until a few days ago I was still in the egomind about dying.
All I could feel is my reaction to the idea… It was grief. I have shared about it in my email a few days ago.
Now it is gone… And this morning I felt my body. I felt the energy still there, the Life Force. And I could feel that this body can still go a long time.
I felt what was there, not the reaction to it.
And that is what you want. That is what gets bigger when you take yourself out of the picture… when you get out of your way.
All the things that I didn’t do ‘because I was on borrowed time’ I can now look at again and see if I should do them or not.
By the way, before I realized that it was grief that was keeping my heart and my stomach bent out of shape, my about-me score was 7%.
That realization removed another 4%, so there can be more joy, and more of Life in my life.
The ‘don’t take things personally‘ is almost saying something useful. Except it is still on the surface, piecework.
The trick is going back, all the way to the beginning, and removing the ‘personal’ there.
Not only that, going back and tracking the want, tracking the ‘wanting to be something’ or ‘afraid to be nothing’ element.
For that I am going to do a live session.
So if you think you want to get out of your own way… because you can see that you are. You can see that your abilities could produce better results and they don’t…
The temporary title of the workshop is ‘Finding and disabling the ego in the original incident’
Finding and disabling the ego in the original incidentPS:
Have you heard the story of the guy whose doctor told me he had cancer and only a short time to live.
He went home and died soon after. Turned out the lab mixed the results, and the guy had nothing wrong with him.
He died from what his mind, egomind told him.
This is exactly how this ego thing works… In the original incident you decided whatever you decided, and you keep on re-creating it.
If what you decided that you were treated as a nobody, instead of someone important, worthy of remembering to not be forgotten in the locked car on a hot Middle Eastern summer day, you’ll recreate that and recreate that and recreate that. And you’ll be in your way to anything that would allow you to just be, do what you need to do, do what you can do, and live your life well. Accomplish if you want to accomplish.
PPS: All the people who write or publish or talk about getting out of your own way haven’t, or not really.
Because unless you go deep within and can get to ‘I am nothing’ and make peace with it, you are to some degree in your own way…
The average about-me score of these people is 70%. The average about-me score of all people is 91%.
But I was often miserable, and was in my own way with 7% about-me score.
I just checked a woman, Nina Amir, who is one of these ‘I’ll teach you to get out of your own way’ types. Her about-me score is 40%. Enough to keep her not happy.
But unless you start, you’ll stay where you are. Blocking your own way…
Just like I used to recreate being a throwaway, not worth keeping until I saw what I was doing… and removed the anchor to it.
PPS: As I promised before, if you have bought or buy the pulling of your anchor to doom, the wanting to be something, whatever that was for you, I’ll also activate the DNA capacity of being willing to be no thing, so you don’t continue trying to prove that you are something.
