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As I wrote in yesterday’s article, we is not part of human culture.In my interaction with clients I am starting to distinguish that there are two dimensions of ‘we’, just like there are two dimensions of ‘love’.
We all want to be included, we all want to be loved. That is the one side, the one dimension of either.
The other dimensions is us including, us loving. The level of that, in the current humanity, is 0%. In the 1000, it is 30%. My level is 70%.
Does wanting to give, giving, making a difference count on that level?
The answer, I bet, is disappointing. The answer is ‘no’.
People want to give, want to make a difference for their own inner needs, not because they care about the recipient.
So even when they give, they take. Not ‘give and take’. No. They take by giving.
I know you want to argue, but please don’t. You give because you want to be right, feel good, look good, dominate, etc. It is desire to receive for the self alone.
I have tested it extensively.
Of my approximately 100 ‘followers’ only two people considered FEELING my pain, my troubles. The rest: even if they could see the troubles, they immediately put it on themselves, and it ended there.
According to one of the people I like to listen to, Roy Williams, we live in the ‘we’ period that lasts 40 years?
We are at the worst part of the we-period, the part that created the Holocaust, the ‘liberating’ army raping the ‘liberated’ population… So ugly. Yeah.
Obviously Roy Williams talks (in the Pendulum) about the lip-service of ‘we’, not the actuality, not the felt ‘we’. The justification of genocide, of murder, or rape… for the ‘common good’… The era of SJW, Social Justice Warriors.
Anyway, I digress.
The two-way WE
Here is the email exchange I had with a student who penetrated the two-way we… He is an aspiring song-writer.
He writes:
OMG, today’s article was exactly what I needed to connect the dots I’ve been missing… I saw that on some level, I’ve been hungry and searching for a ‘we’ for a while now… but I had no idea what I was searching for, it was missing that it was missing, so I only had glimpses of it with different people throughout the years, singular experiences or periods that quickly fizzled out, that weren’t sustainable, or at least that I didn’t sustain.
And I want to thank you for bringing that up also because it finally gave me an angle to approach the song I’ve been working on. It gave me the idea how to write it about and from a ‘we’ experience… And it almost feels like this is the secret to good lyrics… that they either convey the ‘we’ somehow or make you cry about the ‘we’ that’s missing. So people are moved, because it’s so fundamental and profound, even if they have no idea what it is.
It seems like they look for it in all kinds of places, I guess mostly in love and romantic relationships, but they don’t have the distinction, they often don’t see the partner or themselves or both as a person, so it can’t work. But it turns out that romantic relationships are not necessary for a ‘we’… I think especially not if one side ends up dominated, or ‘sacrificing’ themselves for the other, not seeing themselves as a person.
to which I answered:
You are right on about ‘we’ is what inspires people, but the aspect of ‘we’ where they are loved, cared for, saved, nurtured, not the other direction… but it is immaterial.
When I first created the unconditional love activator, I sold about a thousand, because everyone wants to be loved, but no one wants to love. You have somehow, in some miraculous way, have broken that ‘wall’, and you now have a two-way we. And of all people, Baheej as well. Not as strongly as you, but it is still there.
None of the girls…
Now, in this work… my work, where we equally use energies and distinctions, the lack of ‘we’ is actually tragic.
Source energies, healing energies only work when there is a ‘we’. In that context we call it ‘co-creation’.
It’s like carrying a basket: Source holds one handle, you hold the other.
He writes:
I also want to report that while practicing my focus through healing, I had my first experiences of something happening in my body in response to that. Sounds, sensations of some gook moving, slight pains in the area where I held my hand. And I discovered that it all happened after I pushed the energy through my hand with my INTENTION.
So even though I listened to most (I think) of the Intention Course sessions, I’ve only now started to pinpoint how it feels in my body and what it can do. So it’s great learning. And I’m hitting two birds with one stone this way (probably way more, actually!)
It seems like using the intention is crucial for this to qualify as deliberate practice. For it to work.
and I answered:
None of the energies work without co-creating what they are meant to do. The tool that adds you is the intention.
And yes, if and when you are not a taker (and intention takes you out of taker-mode) you feel what the energy is doing… because it is now working. When you are a taker: it doesn’t do the healing.
And here is the full circle: to get out of taker-mode, one needs to activate the ‘we’. Bummer, eh?
And for those of you who are in the Reality Challenge:
Your shoulds…
—about shoulds… Occasionally I get a should. I instantly stop what I am doing, and choose. Choose to do it, or choose not to.
So my inner state is always ‘whole and complete’… all the unattended shoulds take you out of that ‘whole and complete’. Maybe that is what I should write about today.
The distinction is ‘completion’…
Every should that you just let hang out there creates a ‘not whole, not complete’ energetic situation in you. That is why the voices make you miserable, weak, limp, and wretched.
Incompletion is your responsibility.
In the Integrity Course one of the crucial elements of creating integrity is to use the Incomplete Cycles list… and start completing them.
Unfulfilled desires. Conversations you have never had. Regrets. Resentments. Things you didn’t do.
They all break off a little part of your soul, some feathers from your spirit’s wings… and unless you complete them, you are a shadow of yourself.
And you pile up still… All your shoulds, all your I want tos that you don’t act on, are an incompletion.
The most important tool in completing incompletions is the word ‘no’.
I have a thought of a desire… And I say, that is nice, but I am not going to do that. And that ‘no’ completes it. It is done, it is not still hanging out there as and unfulfilled desire.
Or I have a should… I should make rice pilaf… for example. I look at it, and say yay or nay. If I say yes, I also say when. Tomorrow, on Monday. I even take a note of what I would need to actually do that. And I will need to buy rice… I will need a recipe. And I put it in my calendar for Monday.
If I say ‘nay’, I erase it. I choose not to make rice pilaf… in our case.
That’s it today.
Without having the assignment of noticing your shoulds, no one can actually get aware, self-aware enough to see what is going on inside.
That is why if you are not in the Reality Challenge, you’ll continue living unconsciously… as you have been.
How long does it take? I don’t know. It depends entirely on you.
You email me daily your shoulds and what you did with them… I answer. Of course I have you inside a ‘we’, meaning I am on your side. I may be the only person who is on your side, yourself included. So use this opportunity.
So, without using something to wake you up, make you aware, you’ll remain the same… wretched.
Start getting conscious of yourself
