Podcast: Play in new window | Download
In this article I am going to point out the difference between students and clients who grew and those who won’t grow. Didn’t grow. Most likely will never grow.
The goal is so you can find yourself and if willing, change what there is to change about you, so you can change.
Here is the simple truth: what gives you being, doing, is what you see. Now, or in the future… for yourself.
So your main organ that initiates action that creates what you want is your eyes.
But what you see can be stuck on an image that is not real.
Hackers can hack surveillance cameras to detect intruders or to record what people are doing, and make them loop images of empty corridors to mask intruders and their actions.
So the security person sees not what is happening, but what happened at some point in time… over and over.
And this is exactly what happens to humans. They don’t see what is… they see what was.
What makes someone see what was and not what is?
Two mechanisms here:
1. they look through the mind that has recorded the commentary on an earlier similar situation… so now the person only see what the commentary allows them to see. The past got into their eyes. The commentary.
2. this is a variation of the first, but there is a slight difference. There is no specific earlier similar, but the commentary solidified as attitude overlays what is happening, so everything looks the same as everything else.
You’ll see in the case studies how these play out.
Your ‘Case’ is your fundamental attitude towards yourself, towards your life, distorting both, causing suffering and ineffectiveness.
—Case study 1:
This person, early on, when his sister was born, experienced being pushed to the background. Until that point he was the kind of the castle… but that ended abruptly. He was now relegated to secondary.
He didn’t know why… didn’t understand why… and he pondered it a lot. But eventually he decided that he wasn’t what they wanted, they wanted a girl… so he became a girl.
But that wasn’t it either…
Today his attitude is, towards anyone who expresses displeasure, or who wants to teach them, defensive, and counter attacking. Seeing everything and everyone as an attack is what prevents this person from being able to see what is… so their actions would be an accurate response to what is… aka reality.
He can’t overcome this attitude… and therefore he can’t grow. He expects the worst… and he is always in reactive mode.
And he is stuck, for now, in spite his unquestionable talent and abilities and charm.
Please remember: every case study is a snapshot… and not a prediction.
—Case study 2:
This student was born in a troubled part of the world, to a troubled history of his ethnicity. This may be important to understand his ‘case’.
Case is your fundamental attitude towards yourself, towards your life, distorting both, causing suffering and ineffectiveness.
He fancies himself superior. Superior to everything… and maybe even everyone…
There is absolutely no reality to prove that he is even slightly above average… but that doesn’t distract him from believing so. He reaches for the sky… and he believes that it is not only possible, but it is obvious that it is his due to succeed… succeed by just wanting it.
He has disdain for the pedestrian, slow, gradual, effortful… he feels above it…
His larger than life self-image is only his own… people see him normal or maybe even less… and that causes him a lot of hurt feelings.
Seeing the world where you can get what you want in one fell swoop is all he can see… so he is never happy to do what it takes… and he will never succeed… unless he changes his filter… meaning starts to smell to coffee… and see reality the way it is. Everything takes time and many steps to take to fruition.
—Case study 3:
This person has a tendency to see the negative first… or sometimes the negative only. That, surprisingly for many, gives her energy. Energy to act. Energy to move… but unfortunately her need for a secure attachment to someone below her pulls her back.
Some people are moved forward by ‘jet engines’… the motivation is ‘away from what you don’t want’. Others by magnets. For magnets to work they need to be strong and unreachable…
A desire that can be fulfilled will create a self-indulgent life… and no joy.
A desire that is unattainable, like the ‘impossible dream’ of Don Quixote is the perfect magnet.
The ‘jet-engine’ motivated person only needs a direction… and not an actual defined dream. A defined dream will get them off-track…
This case study shows that being jet-engine moved, i.e. negative is a great way to success… and to change. When you see the negative in what you see, it is easier to remove that filter for a moment and look what would be an effective next move… But when you see the positive, or some other filter… they are harder to remove because self-concern works against removing the filter.
—Case Study 4:
The role of religion and its imposed morality
I grew because I am amoral. Meaning: I haven’t subscribed to any religion, any virtue signaling minority or majority. I am my own person. I have strong compass inside pointing to true north. That is all I need to choose my actions.
I call that authenticity… but I am sure many will argue with me on that.
I said that about myself to pit it against the students who grew up with an imposed morality where their own inner compass got out of whack: they don’t allow them to leave things alone, they fear, they judge, themselves as well, and there is no authority there, and no authenticity.
Before I can even decide if they can grow or not, I need to return them to innocence… Innocence is when it’s only you and your inner guidance. Where Life is king, not some person or deity.
It’s possible but not likely. Religion leads very often to piousness and a sense of superiority… with nothing supporting it other than the word of some church people: priests, imams, pastors… all inauthentic users of humanity.
For them you are just meal-ticket. And that is, to me, the most horrendous evil… Desire to receive for the self alone.
Not yours, your ‘moral’ leaders.
You judged yourself and others by some moral principle. You feel superior without having had to do what would make you superior in life… and the comfort of that may not allow you to grow or change your mind.
I have tens for case studies, but enough for today.
If you can change your mind, if you see that it will be good for you, you’ll love the new Intention to Self program. If you cannot change your mind because you know that the moment you do you need to do some HARD work, then you won’t love this program.
You’ve been warned.
Find out who you are and change if you can
