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I’ve decided that there are two kinds of people; those who solve real problems and those who create imaginary ones. ~ quote from the Monday Morning Memo.
This quote arrested me…
True or not if I look at yourself right now, are you solving real problems or are you creating imaginary ones?
Your life, when we look at it, will tell you.
If you solve real problems, and there are enough of those, then you are a problem solver. You are in demand in the marketplace…. if and when you can also sell your solutions.
One of the most difficult things for people to get, and I include myself in that, is that in the world, in the marketplace, you only get paid for what you could sell.
In the marketplace, you only get paid for what you could sell.
You could be the best of anything, solve problems elegantly and fast, if no one buys your solution then you are s.o.l… sh!t out of luck.
And then there are people who can sell, and the problems they solve are imaginary problems not real one, but they sold those solutions, and they sit pretty.
So if you want to sit pretty, focus on mastering marketing and selling.
It’s Valentine’s Day today.
Do you think being able to masterfully sell yourself, sell the idea of romance, sell the idea of togetherness, sell the idea of good times… do you think it comes naturally?
No. Selling is a learned skill. People even with a morsel of that skill outperform those who rely on their looks, their status to ‘buy’ them love. Or maybe they think it is their due.
I look, and see that life doesn’t work that way.
Animals know it… and they sell the promise of good times… You don’t want to sell? Can’t sell? You’ll be alone. I am. I never thought to sell the good times of being with me.
Thinking that you should get what you want is the main thought of entitlement.
Entitlement is what prevents you from doing what is yours to do so you can get what you want.
And, of course, the world, the world of reality, doesn’t work well that way.
So entitlement is a delusional state of mind, that persist in the face of reality. In spite of proof positive that it doesn’t get you what you want.
But that it should get you what you want is deeply anchored in your psyche, and prevents you from doing what is yours to do… and thus prevents you from getting what you want.
Last Tuesday I pulled that energetic anchor to entitlement for a number of clients.
It behaves exactly like an anchor. When I pull it, the root goes deep, it wraps itself around the brain, or the throat, or goes deep inside other organs… It is like a parasite. I need to pull it carefully because pulling it too fast may break the ‘root’ or tail, and then, just like the tail of some animals, it regrows the whole thing.
Is this really true? These kinds of things go on inside you?
Yes, it is true.
Once I pull this anchor, the person has a choice.
What choice?
You see, entitlement, the idea that the world is fixed and it gives or doesn’t give you what you want… is, of course, false.
The world doesn’t give you anything… you earn things, you take things, people give you things, allow you to have things…
But who you are, how you behave, what you say, how you say it, is going to determine what you’ll see, and how others will receive you.
Here is what one of the people on the call wrote to me:
Hi Sophie,
…something came up.
I had a chat with a boutique owner, who is interested in placing a wholesale order for my wares. I tried doing wholesale before, but I failed so I gave up on it, not realizing, until now, that it was the wrong products I was trying to wholesale then.
So now I have a new area to explore, wholesale business for my clothing (tees, sweatshirts, caps) which are my best sellers. I would have probably not listened to this lady if the anchors were not pulled…again with your help, I can see another opportunity. Thank you so much!
Entitlement is rigid.
It says: ‘I want what I want exactly the way I want it‘… And anything that would come as a gift, but different from what you wanted isn’t appreciated, isn’t received well…
- There is a way of being when people are happy to give you because it makes them feel good about themselves.
- And then there is the way of the entitled: people may give you, but it just doesn’t feel right. Like feeding a dog that snaps at your finger… Doesn’t feel right.
Co-creation
I am very giving, and I attract disproportionately high number of takers.
When entitlement, the anchor is still on, the whole idea of co-creation sound ludicrous to the person with the anchor. Even though co-creation is the way the world works best.
Everything I do, sell, or teach is co-creative.
I do something. It opens a door for you to walk through and do what previously you could not do.
It can be a mindset. A context. Revealing an invisible dynamic.
Or it can be an energy… A DNA adjustment. Energetic surgery, like pulling an anchor… The anchor to doom, the anchor to entitlement.
Unless you do what is yours to do, what only you can do, they won’t do what they were designed to do.
To do things together with you.
I have ‘ex’ clients who write to me months, years after they stop working with me, to let me know that the moment they allowed what they learned or got from me to co-create with them, big results are there.
What am I saying here?
There are people who work with me for years, and then turn around and start doing something as if they had never learned anything, as if they had everything the same as before. Meaning: they don’t allow the energies or the methods to work with them, in tandem.
So they will produce what they can produce without the help of all they’d gotten over the years.
Why would they do such a thing?
Inside the cave of their minds, Plato’s Cave, their worldview is thus: You either pick me up and take me, do for me, and I don’t have to do anything, or I do things on my own.
So they lack the notion of ‘we’.
The ‘soaring together‘, or mutual support… We.
They have ‘I’, and they have ‘You’, but they don’t have ‘We’.
I just went through and muscletested this exact question, if they have ‘we’ in their vocabulary.
I found that only a handful do. The same ones with the results worth writing home about.
If you find yourself with that dual worldview: it is either given to me, or I go and get it myself, it’s entitlement.
It’s a worldview. And if you have it, it’s everywhere.
It is Valentine’s Day, so I’ll look at romance, intimacy… it is there in spades.
Sex, when ‘we’ isn’t there, is just doing for yourself or doing for another. Not intimacy. Or mutual. Or something to write home about.
But so is with everything.
The food you eat, the supplements you take. You either co-create, or not.
I cannot change your worldview. You can. I can help. Together we can… You probably can’t do it for yourself because it needs the same energy: co-creation. We.
In my courses and workshop, if and when you have a chance to be there, or listen to a recorded one, you can clearly hear the difference between different people. Their energy in the class is either co-creative, ‘do for me‘, or the opposite: ‘I am on my own. I’ll do what I’ll do. I don’t even want you to know what I am doing‘.
I find that most people on the planet have this issue…
…although the cause of it may be different.
When I look at your soul correction: 2’s can’t see co-creation possible. 3’s are too arrogant to even consider another.
If there is a number 2 in your soul correction number, you have an issue with ‘we’. Cooperation and balance.
The path to human being is to have cooperation and balance.
When you embark on the journey of changing your worldview…
…so you can include ‘we‘ in your vocabulary, your first step is to actually see that you don’t have a ‘we’… and just observe it. Observe as it separates you from everyone, and makes you feel like a victim or a king.
As if it were other people who don’t want a ‘we’.
You may use ‘other people cannot be trusted’ and that is at the root of your no ‘we’ worldview. Or-ness.
Whatever it is, having both the anchor to doom and the anchor to entitlement pulled can be the first step.
Why do you NEED to have those anchors pulled?
Changing a worldview that is anchored to unreality is impossible. Literally not possible…
Because even if you manage to pull away from the anchor, the ‘rope’ of the attachment will always pull you back.
The repeated scripted life where you are always snapped back to your default. You have that if you still have your anchors.
Is it worth spending money on having your anchors pulled?
- Yes, if you are willing to do the work.
What is the work? You first observe, and then gently pull away, and then grow, gently, the distance you can move from the doom or the entitled worldview.
It may even work without the DNA adjustment. In fact this is exactly the move that helps you learn to use the capacities the DNA adjustment makes available.
- No, if you are not willing to do the work. No, if you don’t want any support, if you don’t want to even talk to me, if you don’t want anyone to tell you anything you don’t want to hear. If you are a lone ranger, if your attitude is: I’ll take what I get to my cave…
Here is a word that may give you additional insight:
Sharing. Sharing is a we-word.
Talking about something is not sharing. Unless the other person, also has what you are sharing, you didn’t share.
A good example is a cookie. Let’s say an oatmeal/raisin cookie. It smells delicious as it comes out of the oven.
You can talk about the cookie, its taste, how nice chewy it is, but unless you hand over a cookie to the other, you didn’t share.
Another example: we are sitting on a cart and you have the reins in your hand. You need help, but you are not willing to let go of the reins… Or alternatively you hand over the reins but don’t even say where you wanted to go…
Both holding onto the reins or handing them over are entitlement issues… and leave you with less power than you had before.
So you see, unless you are willing to change your attitude towards ‘we’, if you are not willing to change, you probably should not ask me to pull your anchors…
Your willingness is mandatory.
People, who don’t know any better, say things like: ‘adjust your vibration to the vibration of what you want and it will come to you‘
Do you think, in light of these anchors and your unwillingness to change your behavior and worldview, that statement can be true?
Once I pull your anchor, and you do your inner work and you do the outer work of changing your actions… you’ll have different actions available to you. Actions that have different results than what you have been producing.
Ultimately what you get rewarded for are actions that produce value for other people.
Even if you managed to do the actions that produce value for other people, if the anchors, one or both are still in place, the potential buyer will get the energy of the doom or the entitlement, and it will repel them.
Unless, of course, they somehow resonate with your anchors… because they have the exact same…
It is all just talking AT people, never ever really connecting.
If life as it is, alone, and separate isn’t to your liking, and you are willing to embark on what it takes to change that, the anchor pulling, coaching, guidance, handholding are available to you.
In the current challenge people are jotting down what they spend their time with.
Tomorrow I’ll ask you to look at what you can see about your activity log, and how you can start tweaking your day, making better choices, so your life start turning towards a life that is more to your liking.
We’ll embark on the trimtabbing method. It is also called Kaizen…
…the art of tiny changes that culminate in huge changes. But the change is always almost imperceptible, and tiny.
So if I wanted to christen this challenge, I would probably call it the Kaizen Challenge…
It is free, even though I probably will have online meetings to support you, and you can email me and receive an answer.
Why am I doing this?
The simple answer is: because I can. Much like some mountain climbers say: I climbed Mount Everest because it was there…
- If you have started listing your activities and haven’t let me know: notice that you reject ‘we’.
- If you haven’t started, you may want to focus on what the internal dialog is, what the voices in your head say… and make that your first step.
You can start now… Don’t have to send me your list. But if you want support, you may want to look what it would be like if we shared the rein… and took that cart where you wanted to go… together.
Tomorrow I’ll add a small step to the challenge, and we’ll go like this… weekly small steps… all the way to heaven.
In the meantime, If you think that your anchor to doom, or your anchor to entitlement are a serious issue for you, you can pay me to pull them.
The doom is an end result that you dread. It looks inevitable if you behave exactly the way you have been behaving. Arrogant, resistant, avoiding responsibility, justifying, explaining, pulling out, pulling ahead,…
So, in essence what keeps the doom front and center in your mind is the way you deal with it. It is your horrible, almost certain future. And how you deal with it is how you deal with everything you don’t like.
For me the doom is not having a home. For you it may be disgrace, being left behind, not even being loved by anyone, never doing anything right, discarded, killed, abandoned, trashed, etc.
There is a dominant belief underneath that.
I can’t change your dominant belief, and muscletest says you cannot change it either.
- What there is to do with something you cannot change is to HAVE IT.
- When you run from it: you don’t have it, it has you.
- When you willfully ignore it, you don’t have it, it has you.
Most everything ‘has you’, instead of you having it.
Fear, hate, beliefs…
Before you can have it, you need to bring it into reality. Into reality where nothing is wrong. And see that what has you is not wrong. It is not right. It just is. It is what it is.
I have a dominant belief that I am worthless. Last night I found the Hungarian word for that ‘semmirevaló’. Good for nothing. I cried myself to sleep. And then I slept really well.
Today I looked at it again, and it’s not wrong, it’s not right, it is just words
My parents probably have said it, and they also used other words around it.
But the essence was: they didn’t see that I was going to amount to anything. When I wanted to learn to drive, they said: ‘don’t do it, you’ll kill people‘.
I am not sure where they looked to see that. It is clear to me that they didn’t see me in reality or they would have changed their minds about me.
When my mother came to visit me 30 years ago, all she could see what confirmed for her that I was ‘semmirevaló’, maybe even ‘semmirekello’. Good for nothing. Ne’er do well. I could see and feel what she saw… She never saw me and the good. The courageous, amazing things that I had done. EVER.
But unless I make a conscious decision to just HAVE that I am worthless, it will continue to be something that I either run from, or run towards.
And I have been doing that all my life, running from and running towards… Just like you.
So, as always, I am in this challenge with you… and I will practice ‘having’ what has been having me.
Because I have pulled my anchors already, I probably have it easy… It is work, but more like giving it some tender loving care.
OK, here is the link to get your anchor pulled…
Get your anchor(s) pulledI have been doing this work for over 30 years, and had never seen it before.
If you would like to hear that call, you can buy it. If you are struggling with a dominant belief this may be your lucky day and learn from my example.
The dominant belief call
