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What can you learn from a theoretical physicist, a famous ad writer, art collector to become a person… yourself?
What does an ad writer have to do with being happy, fulfilled, and joyful? Other than selling it to you… lol… right?
Most things that I teach are difficult to understand enough that you actually know it and can teach it. Unless you can teach it, you didn’t learn it… The Feynman technique teaches how to get there… but this article is not about that.
Knowing what I talk about, really KNOWING is mandatory if you want to use it to become a human being.
Unless you can teach it, you don’t know it. Even repeating what I say verbatim would be a big step for most of the people who read my articles, come to my live sessions.
Literally no one takes the effort, for some ego reason.
I spent, about two third of my life trying to prove that I am not stupid… Not proving that I am smart, but that I am not stupid.
Stupid is one extreme of the pendulum, it swings from stupid to not stupid and back, forever.
Depending what was your understanding, what was your meaning of how people treated you as a child, you have either useful, or not so useful endpoint to your pendulum.
Everyone has a pendulum.
If the end points are defined like they were defined wrongly for me, you’ll spend most of your life in a unproductive quest to prove yourself… even though the issue wasn’t what you thought it was.
- The issue with me wasn’t smart/stupid… it was thing/person. Whether i am a thing or a person. I could have argued for being a person, and my life wold have been productive…
- A student of mine thought that his issue was somebody/nothing for him… but recently it turned out that the issue was also thing/person for him. We have the same soul correction… maybe that has something to do with it… we shall see.
What he did to prove that he was not nothing is made up big plans to be somebody big… beyond his capacity, beyond his inclination. Had he worked on becoming a person, being a person, his life would have been a whole lot happier. He would have avoided decades of heartache.
- Yet another student of mine’s pendulum swings between belonging or not belonging… and that is, you see the pattern, was not the issue. It was, yet again, an issue of being treated like a luggage: when you don’t need it it is tucked to the back of the closet. When you need it you take it out.
Thing/person… again.
When you are compared, or you feel you are… the issue is, again, thing/person.
Why? Because people cannot be compared. People are as unique as snow flakes, maybe even more. So when you compare people, you don’t look at them as people, you look at them as things. You could compare their behavior, their looks, their voice, their skills… but not the person.
One person, no matter what, no matter how they look, no matter their behavior, is as valuable as the next person… because now, that you are looking at the person, you are looking at the inside, and inside all people are of the same value. All have 160 spiritual/DNA capacities that can be turned on or turned off.
- Ted Bundy had 160 spiritual capacities. He had 10 of those turned on. It takes special skills to dupe so many women… and avoid being captured.
- Donald Trump also has 160 spiritual capacities. None turned on…
- The Dalai Lama has 160 spiritual capacities. Three are turned on.
- Hitler had 160 spiritual capacities. None turned on.
- My favorite example, the chainsaw massacre person who I just read up… he also had 160 spiritual capacities.
So inside we are all the same. The spiritual capacities, some skill capacities, most beingness capacities are either expressed or not… and visible to those who consider the other a person… and invisible to those who don’t.
Some spiritual capacities masquerade as usefulness… and can be seen, even if and when you look at the ‘person’ as a thing.
Most people admire Steve Jobs. For what? Not for being a person, but for what he did. For his product. For his social standing. But not for being a person. In fact, when i talk to people who really admire him, they say he was a horrible person… and keep on seeing only the usefulness value.
A man, Robert Hartman grew up in Nazi Germany, and pondered evil. He emigrated to the United States, and became an expert in Value Science, and even creating a system in measuring values.
He categorized values by their number of facets and how rare they were.
- Systemic values have two poles, good/bad, smart/stupid, belonging/not belonging… the pendulum.
Most of humanity, most of the time, is stuck in seeing and judging systemic values.
- Extrinsic values are the worldly values, the kind of values people would pay money for. Use value, enjoyment value, practical value. A bowl of chili on a cold day, a string when you need to tie something, a hug when you feel sad, a flower to decorate your room or garden. A pretty wife on your arms to look prosperous. A cow and its ability to produce milk. A worker who produces a product for you. All extrinsic values.
Even what a Steve Jobs did… all extrinsic value. When it comes to a person: what can you do for me? is the question extrinsic values answer.
You get paid for the extrinsic value the payer gets. A product or a feeling… For flattering them and making them feel high and mighty as a result. For giving them babies… For teaching them something they want to learn.
I am seen by every student of mine for my extrinsic value: for what they get.
None sees me as a person of immense value regardless of what I provide… and they don’t see themselves that way either.
What gives me and everyone immense value is the intrinsic values. The intrinsic values that are either expressed or not… but even when they are, value is only seen on the level the observer is at.
Value is in the eye of the beholder…
If the ‘beholder’ sees value, they he sees it valuable.
Most people, most of the time, walk about in the world not seeing value.
You even treat god as a luggage:
when you need it, you pull it out of the closet. Sometimes you see that it has some usefulness value… not often.
You read: god created man to his own image… and because you see a thing, called god, you consider yourself a thing too. Your Jesus, your Mohammed, your Allah, your Indian gods… all things… at most have extrinsic value in your eyes.
In the Validation Challenge people report of acknowledging or complimenting people on their hair color, on their skin tone, on their car, on their dog.
Barely even extrinsic value, just systemic…
Your ex husband picks up your kids because you have something else to do: even that you see through the systemic value level… Extrinsic would be: He gave me freedom to do what I had to do at the time… No. If you acknowledge anything about it: it is like telling the dog: good doggie… brought me my slippers.
Now, here is the question that you could ask, and it would be good if you asked it:
why bother, if this is the level of humanity and all the people you live with?
Intelligent question. Why really?
If you had a chance to be a fly on the wall of my workshops, you would be able to see what I see: people being stuck being a thing for themselves, not because they are, but because that is how they felt they were treated as a kid. Treated as.a.thing.
Like a bag of chips, like a disposable coffee cup, like a luggage that can be shoved to the back of the closet. A thing that has no feelings, no dignity, not human. Not a person.
The little girl who had nightmares… The little girl whose mother worked in the big city and she was shoved to the grandmother’s… where she was treated like entertainment for the neighbors. The little boy who was locked in the car so human traffickers can’t steal him… after all he is property, he has to be kept safe… but forgotten in the car and nearly died, no matter what the parents say in hindsight.
People treat you and have always treated you as a thing, and so you resigned yourself to being a thing… But you aren’t. You are a person!
Instead of being mad at people who treated and treat you like a thing… work on becoming a person for yourself.
How do you do that?
The method is counter intuitive. You become a person when you start seeing others as a person. The same people who treat you like a thing… it takes generosity… I warn you.
Giving it to them for no reason… They won’t even necessarily notice, and sure as hell won’t appreciate it. But the way to open up personness is to grant it to others.
How long it takes? I have no idea. I did it semi-consciously…
In the Validation Challenge I turn the capacity on to be able to see value in another… One of the 160 spiritual capacities.
Your job is to bring generosity to it. Generosity of spirit. Grant them beingness, grant them personness. It doesn’t have to be visible for you to see it. You need to FEEL it… after all what is inside, and all personness is inside, is not readily visible UNTIL you grant them the reasonable doubt that it is there. That they are feeling, thinking persons… and what they feel and what they think matters to them.
That they bleed, that they hurt, that they cry in the dark… Just like you.
That everyone sees them as a thing, and they feel restricted, restrained, limited, by being treated that way. That they have the human spirit in them that wants to soar… but seeing themselves as a thing prevents them from soaring with the spirit.
If you are having a hard time with it… think how you would look at an animal.
You would be delighted that it smiles… You would notice that they want love… Give the same consideration to some people… You see animals as persons, some of you see flowers as person… but withhold your consideration from people.
Some of you may have one person in your life who sees you as a person… even though you have never granted them the same… and you wonder what they see in you that they treat you like that. You surely didn’t earn it… And you can’t.
And that is the thing: intrinsic values don’t earn a thing. So when you wait for the other person to earn your benevolence bestowing beingness on them… you are waiting for some extrinsic thing… intrinsic is not visible…
Everyone considers the Dalai Lama a big thing… and he delivers in talk. But when you look the way I can look, he has 3 spiritual capacities open… and he is fully sh*t… Talks a good talk… that’s all. Does he see himself or others as a person? No, not at all. He probably doesn’t even know he could… because he has never SEEN the difference.
He, as a little boy, was stolen from his family and was trained for a job… and now he is his job.
When I ask you who you are, you think and settle on your status, on your occupation, on your gender… but none of your personness is ever mentioned there.
When I look, I see that who I am is what I am up to. Who I am is someone who wants the whole of humanity to eventually follow the Original Design, the DNA, and become human beings… And I am willing to give my life for that, the lucrative income I could earn, the leisurely lifestyle I could enjoy, given what I can do… Instead I give my life to something I can’t do… but am willing to die trying.
And believe it or not, it makes me happy, fulfilled, and makes my life worth living. Makes no sense, right? Right.
What if you started to define yourself as the aspiration you have, and not how you have been defining yourself, as a thing.
In my new transformational training I attend to every aspect of the transformation you’ll need to go through to become a person for yourself… and get access to the joy, the fulfillment, the power that eludes 99.99% of humanity, that is impossible to experience as a thing.
The new program is a combination of three transformational programs… the Validation Challenge, the Future Self process, and the 3-wishes exercise… It also includes turning on spiritual capacities that are needed, and energy support in audios, when that is what is needed.
The program endeavors digging out the thorn in your side, accurately identifying it… not like you have, not even like WE have (if you’ve been with me for some time)
If you have been with me for some time, and can’t or don’t want to give as much time as the new program asks, you can continue the workshops you have been doing… and I make sure you can keep up. You won’t get the two private calls a month… that is for people who pay for the whole thing.
PS: I have been searching high and low. I want to see examples of people in history who saw intrinsic value, who saw people as persons.
Eugene Schwartz, famed advertising man said this:
‘The only important thing about art is the art itself — not its monetary value, not its social prestige, not its public-relations leverage,’
What he said can be translated to everything. If you want to be a person, keep that quote handy and check in with it periodically… to see if you value things, people for what and who they are… for the right reason, so you can remain a person, or become a person.
What Eugene Schwartz says is that art’s intrinsic value is the art itself… not its use value, not its usefulness to you or to anyone… got it?
He also writes: ‘New art will violate what you think good art is, and should be measured not by immediate pleasure but by the shock and challenge to your expectations.’
My articles, my teachings are hopefully an example of that: their shock value is the value, the thing that it doesn’t conform to the worldview currently in vogue.
Why am I bringing up Gene Schwartz in this article?
Because he became the copywriter he was because he saw the inside of people, and he saw them as persons.
I quote:
Schwartz focuses on human nature and our tendency for hopes, dreams, fears, and desires. We don’t need to create these — they already exist in the hearts of millions of people.
You consider what your stomach WANTS more than what your fellow human wants… You treat your stomach more like a person than you treat your wife or husband.
And, of course, they are not happy… How could they be? You know what it’s like to be treated like a thing… and now you know how they feel.
The methodology that revealed itself over the past few weeks, especially since I saw the sadness on one of my students’ face, can take you to the place where you can see others and yourself as a person… and get access to fulfillment, joy, and the good life.
It can take you… I said, and I mean it. I can take you to the ‘water’, but you have to do the drinking.