Develop the capacity and the skill to take criticism, correction, judgment and opinion like a Man (meaning a human being)
One of the capacities that you want to activate and develop is the capacity and the skill to take criticism, correction, judgment and opinion like a Man (meaning a human being).
One of my students violated copyright recently, and I sent her an email
…you have a profound disregard to my intellectual property. I did not sell you the right to do this. So please don’t do it again, and don’t pride yourself on how crafty you are. Stop gutting, combining, etc. the audios you bought the right to use, but not the right to gut them, recombine them. You don’t own them, I do.
Then, inadvertently, I stayed connected to her… not a pleasant experience.
She went into anger and belligerence first. Then was ruminating about it, looking up excuses, justifications, etc.
Then came anguish, shame, guilt…
So what would a “Man” do… as opposed to a human machine?
A Man would say something like this: “oops, sorry about that. I didn’t realize this fun thing I was doing with your audios violates your copyright. I won’t do it again. But how would someone like me, with vivid imagination, and creativity get all what’s possible out of your audios? Any ideas?”
That would put the ball into my court, it would engage me, it would make this a dialog instead of a self-eating monolog. Life would not stop to a halt. You would not feel worthless, ever gain.
And I would not have to think that I have to tiptoe around you. That I am not allowed to say what there is to say in fear that you will get offended, stop being my student, be my friend, etc. etc. etc.
Listen, if you are living, if you do things, you will do things wrong. You’ll step on toes. You’ll screw things up!
Normal, that is how life is. Life isn’t smooth sailing, boring, etc.
I have read somewhere that stress is needed for health… I think that Hungarian professor (dr. Selye) wrote it in his discovery: there is stress and there is distress. 1
A life void of mistakes, void of stress leads to early death. Leads to Alzheimer’s. Leads to a meaningless, empty life, not worth living.
Contain your ego (that wants to take care of you) and go out of your way to make mistakes. 2 Don’t look for easy, don’t look for repeating what you already know, be expanding: mistakes that you learn from, errors that you learn from lead to self-growth.
Don’t be a passenger in your life: be the driver, make wrong turns, take the scenic route, mess up, grow.
Don’t know how? Good… try one way, you’ll soon learn it.
Even death is better than living a life of quiet desperation.
The best thing I can offer to develop this capacity is the Sleepy Time version of the Unconditional Love Activator. That activator implants the knowledge that you do not need to earn survival, love, the right to be here… you were born with it.
- Dr. Selye says: Learn how to use stress as a positive force to achieve a rewarding lifestyle. Life gives you stress, and it is wonderful. The distress comes from you, not from Life. The distress comes from you for not being able to be with life, with being wrong, making mistakes, other people having an opinion, etc.
- Actually, if you can connect to Source, then inside that connection you can talk to your Ego and create an agreement with Ego to support you in making mistakes, as long as you are willing to promise that you won’t make silly wild turns, and destroy everything in the process. Ego wants to keep you alive, and Ego doesn’t like big changes. But it is there to support you, and it will, I promise. As long as you are willing to be the Boss in the relationship.
