Self-image… the lies, the misunderstanding, the delusions… Can you change it?

1b19f2f6d457c34df696dee90d9b0369Let us not confuse ourselves by failing to recognize that there are two kinds of self-confidence — one: a trait of personality and another: that comes from knowledge of a subject. It is no particular credit to the educator to help build the first without building the second. The objective of education is not the production of self-confident fools.” ~ Albert Bandura, Self Efficacy: The Exercise of Control, p.65

When I ask a person about their self-image, they have a different image of themselves consciously than on the first brain unconscious level.

Here are a few examples:Back in 1987 my conscious self-image, the one I promoted, was that I was very smart. My unconscious, automatic self-image was that I was a failure, or more precisely, a failure waiting to happen.


A friend of mine has a conscious self-image of being quite intelligent, a go getter. But his unconscious self-image must be: I am a moron…

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Now, how would you know that?

The conscious, promoted self-image you probably know, it is something you invented as a social tool.
The unconscious, automatic self-image will be trickier… it speaks both in the language of omission, and in the language of commission.

albert-bandura-psychologist-quote-people-who-believe-they-have-the

b7a1a8ec3338310b9f8b677ca72e12e6It will prevent you from doing things that don’t fit the self-image, and make you do things that do.

The combination is tragic, and bringing that dichotomy, that inner tension to the surface is one of the most important things you can ever do to improve your life.

You can also ask yourself a question while standing in front of the mirror:

Am I the kind of person who X?
Can I see myself doing X?

It’s not foolproof, but still useful.

DzuZDQVLjA_1400733785465I have been using this to make more conscious decisions about my purchases or work… Am I the kind of person who would do live videos on Facebook? Can I see myself charging a thousand dollars for something that is worth only $65?

As I have said before, the biggest cause, maybe the only cause of your misery in life is the distance between your to YOU’s… the self and the Self.

Bringing them closer together is the single most important job of any coaching program.

The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.

The truth will create for you a roadmap, the beginning and the end of a project: the delusion and the self you can be happy with, the Self with which you can produce the results you hope to produce.

albert-bandura-quotes-3albert-bandura-quote-behavior-cognitive-and-other-personal-factorsA road map that cannot be traveled in your head, it can only be drawn.

Too many people teach you to do things in your head, to train your mind.

Someone sent me this video… and I suddenly saw that all the mind training b.s. is trying to make the automatic brain make more positive decisions for you, without you having to do any real thinking.

Yeah, thinking is hard work. But without the real thinking you are a machine… a robot. And unhappy.

Brandon Burchard, personal vibration: 200, has 10 spiritual capacities, overall intelligence: 90, his actions and mood are controlled by the automatic brain: 80% of the time. For comparison: my actions and mood are controlled and driven by the automatic brain 50% of the time.

Some lives, some work requires very little actual thinking. One of the things I HATED about being an architect (17 years plus my studies!) was that you only needed, maybe 5% of the time to even pay attention to what you were doing.

albert-bandura-quote-by-exercising-control-over-a-few-healthy-habitsI could watch TV while doing the work. Or listen to the radio.

Lawyers, doctors, don’t use their thinking capacities, with some exception.

You could see in the movie “Something the Lord Made” the professor wasn’t thinking, while his assistant did. (the movie is posted in the paid section of my subscribers’ site)

I have dedicated my life to thinking… because all this non-thinking needs to be countered.

Was the Jesus character thinking with the thinking brain?? Not at all.
Was the Moses character thinking? A small fragment of the time.
Was the Buddha thinking? No.
Was Osho thinking? a minuscule percentage of the time
If you read my answer to a comment… even Stephen Hawking doesn’t do much thinking.

OK, returning the self-image, sorry for the detour…

Let’s ask the question: can self image be altered? Yes.

albert-bandura-quote_14115-1Can it be altered by a course? Not really.

Can being in a coaching program (dialog) change your self-image? yes.

The difference between a course and a coaching program is the in a coaching program you are monitored…

I am talking about a one-on-one coaching program, not the kind where you get to see a video, and then do some work on your own.

Unless you are under constant supervision, you are on your own…

Can anyone change their self-image? Not unless the soul correction is not too vested in it staying delusional.

The amount of money I make with my coaching program does not pay half of my rent… I am doing it because it is both a training for me, and a scientific laboratory.

So far this is the work that makes the most difference in moving towards developing the curriculum to evolve humans into human beings.

Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar