Business, marketing, and other business things are not my favorite things to learn or do. Even though I come from a family where three out of five (I have two brothers) have MBAs, and my father was god of the topic in Hungary…
I gave up going for it one credit short: an enemy of my father would not let me pass an exam…
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
~Thomas A. Edison
I don’t like these topics because they need organization, creating systems, and I am not good at them. I tighten up when I have to do things I am not good at.
I could learn to be good at them, but everything comes at a cost, time and brain cells taken away from what I am best at.
But…
Let’s see if it would be worth it…
Yesterday a site, Flipboard, I reposted an excerpt to one of my articles, and sent me 2,500 visitors. And I did not have a good functioning net to catch them with and ask them what brought them to the site, how can I help them… I did add more than 50 to my mailing list… so I can invite them back, time and time again. so I was half prepared. The rest…
Lost, for eternity.
It’s like having an open house but being absent… with not even a guest book
If you are lucky people will ask for you… but basing a life on luck is the lottery approach.
This is one of the most missing principles for people:
Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.
But preparation is in sharp contrast with the life most people live: directed by circumstances.
Preparation is an inner vision thing: you need to foresee that preparation is needed for something down the line. (The Sight capacity anyone?)
What can you consider preparation?
You can prepare for a rainy summer, a flood, for visitors to come, for a lull in income…
And you can prepare for an opportunity.
The trouble with preparing for an opportunity is that you hope it will come, but hope means: you don’t expect it.
Why wouldn’t you expect it?
Because you don’t expect, can’t expect something you haven’t taken steps to incorporate, to meet head on.
I have a friend who always wanted to be a millionaire.
Wanting to is another expression that belies that you don’t expect it to happen.
In his business he has some opportunities for some extra money to come in… but it would take him some preparation, some study, some innovative thinking. For that he is not willing.
When I asked what he could do for extra money, he listed a few manual labor items… none of which would earn him more than 20 bucks an hour… you won’t become a millionaire with a skill level like that.
And that is the gist of this principle: opportunities favor the prepared “mind”… the one that is knowledgeable, skilled, and expects the opportunity.
You want to do some soul searching to see that in fact you don’t believe you can, you don’t believe you will.
You look backward and see your track record, and you know, and you expect yourself to be the same, and never change.
You really get in life what you expect.
Why? Because expectation is a kind of “mental representation” that your behavior, consciously or unconsciously, adjusts itself to… in a “falling in step” way.
It’s not intellectual. It is not forced. It is energetic. It’s the “space” that the expectation provides.
Sometimes another person can open up the space for you.
But mostly the space is defined by your environment, the people you associate with, family, spouse, children… that “know” you, and thus limit you.
So becoming someone who can create an expectation that makes them prepare so when opportunity comes is rare.
Because you are not only up against your inertia, you are up against all the expectation of other people of you: expecting you to stay the same.
This is why after holidays people fall below their baseline.
This is why my amazing student who is studying in China dropped everything with regards to his health when he went home for summer vacation.
Evolution cannot happen in communities.
I read and loved the book “White Tiger” about an Indian boy who becomes a social entrepreneur by escaping the “chicken coop” of his caste.
The stronger your desire to belong, the less likely that you will do what it takes to grow.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to belong, with belonging. Just be realistic. You can’t have both.
Growth, evolution, is a solitary “activity”.
You either fall in step with your own drummer, or with your group’s drummer.
They drum a different tune.
You’ll need to choose.
One more thing: the worst thing you can do for yourself is sharing with your family/friends what you are up to. It’s a threat to them, and they’ll prefer you dead than escape the chicken coop.
Zip your mouth, and do your thing… if you choose growth and evolution.
PS: Mental representation: being able to see yourself doing what it takes to meet the opportunity. Studying, building, selling, writing… whatever it takes.
Most people, like my friend, think “seeing yourself having it” means using the spoils of the opportunity… but unless the opportunity has legs… it is as far as it will ever be… unattainable. Seeing yourself spending the money, writing checks, is not expectation. It is delusion. Or daydreaming.
Unless you see at least a few of the first steps, you’ll not be able to get prepared.
If you want to cross a river, you need a boat, a bridge, or strong swimming skills. All need a ton of skills and work.
Got it?
PPS: Your self image is the most important factor in your success. If you know yourself as a slacker, you have a stronger tendency to remain one than to change.
I see that I need to do a self-image action, urgently, today, to mend my self image to become closer to someone who does things when they are easy… because I have The Sight.
I am glad you feel good about yourself
Good advice peppered throughout this article. ‘Zip your mouth and do your thing.’ My mom drilled many anecdotes into me about this one. It’s one thing that I have observed about myself that I do that’s been beneficial to my successes. (What I consider success) Proper preparation prevents poor performance. So, yes, prepare to keep your mouth shut. Sophie, thanks for this article. I look back on my track record and smile, to myself. Thanks for putting it in writing.