Happiness is a rope dance, walking a thin line. No wonder you are not happy… or how lack of humility is the big issue
Little more about humility… the cog in the wheel
One detrimental functions of ‘lack of humility’ as a capacity, is that you can’t change your mind about your past.
My Playground program was about changing your mind by changing your view…
At the time I didn’t know about capacities, so I could not tell how come someone can and others can’t change their mind.
In spite of all evidence to the contrary, in spite of all the reframing we did, only one person could change her mind, really, and even her, only changed her mind, retrospectively, when she finally got humility, the capacity, turned on.
It’s clear to me now, that you can do all the right things and still get no results if you have something missing in the foundation.
Capacities are foundation.
We are most aware of mental capacities, especially the ones that seem to be required to get at least passing grades in school. But no one really appreciates the enormous importance of behavioral and beingness capacities.
Anyone I talk to wants to be happy. But happiness is a capacity. I am not kidding. And you don’t have it. Because if you can only feel happy if something extraordinary happens to make you feel happy, then you don’t know happy from Adam… you are a miserable wretch, mostly pretending to be happy, or at least OK.
But if circumstances are that important to you: it’s time to smell the coffee: circumstances tend to be miserable. The world will never go your way. People will never do what you think they should do. The weather will always have something to complain about.
You go from ‘not happy’ to ‘not happy’, and that’s your life.
Churchill said: ‘Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm’
What you don’t hear, because you don’t have the distinction, and neither did he, is the beingness is enthusiastic, and no failure changes the being… failure is a circumstance.
Until you get some beingness under your belt, into your toolbox, you’ll continue being miserable… and miserable people don’t deserve what they want, because deserving anything means ‘being worth a damn’ and when you are miserable, you aren’t.
Pretending not being miserable doesn’t change your being, only the surface… and adds inauthenticity to the mix. Very unattractive.
But no matter what you want in life, until you get humility, your chances of getting happiness, without forcing, prostituting yourself, cheating and lying, will be largely impossible.
Of course you could bring me examples, sports stars, movie stars, politicians who seemingly got what they wanted… mostly money and fame.
But if you looked into their hearts, they are miserable, because money and fame don’t give you what you really want: a sense of intrinsic worth, self-love, peace, and certainty, a sense of real worth.
So, if you look, unless you have that first, unless you have the capacity to be that, no money, no fame, no success will change who you are: miserable where it matters: inside.
Osho said: nothing fails like success. And this is what he means.
Of course Osho didn’t know about capacities, just like I didn’t know about capacities even a few months ago. I did and I didn’t.
I say, and this is a statement that needs to be proven, that it is possible to become a happy, fulfilled person first and then go out and get wildly successful in the world. Of course if you lose the capacities, then you’ll go miserable again.
I myself walk a thin line, the tightrope. Almost every email I get is designed to pull me out of ‘all is well‘ and ‘nothing is missing‘ into ‘something missing and it’s wrong that it’s missing‘ or ‘someplace is better than here‘.
In an obscene way, this is a practice of mine: almost getting caught, and escaping the jaws of greed. It’s a lot like working out…
Result at this point: I am OK with what I have, while I am working on projects that bring in more of what I want. No greed, no fixing… just working on projects. Very thin line… need to be a rope-dancer to stay there. Walk the tightrope…
The other aspect of walking a thin line, rope dancing, is this: any undesirable circumstance that want to pull you off.
For example, I have been getting these attachments for the past few weeks. In the beginning my attitude was: ‘I must remove them or… blah blah blah’ Then I started to get aware that I was being that ‘there is something wrong, unless’
Now I just let them be. They fall off… they are not ‘real’ energetic attachments, they need to be energized over there where the voodoo doll is. So they are on and then they are off.
When I need to turn on a capacity, or check something, or energize my water, I check if I can connect to Source on the third level, and if I feel that the attachment on my Tangerine Spot is in the way, I gently remove it. No hurry, no haste, no fixing. Just gently remove what is in the way.
That is a rope dance: you want to be aware, and not complacent. This is harder for me: there is a lot of pull for me to be resigned.
Some 30 years ago, a seminar leader said: ‘Move towards the fear, call it excitement.‘
I just got it, this morning, that it is a total bullshit, wrong teaching. It’s positive thinking, that has caused more misery than anything else in human history, including the Christian Church.
Why? Because the beingness of positive thinking is that ‘negative is wrong. you must change it. fast. hurry‘
But yet, there is something potentially valuable in what the seminar leader said: you can use what you don’t like as training. Training in acceptance, training in allowing, training in being unscathed, unattached, undisturbed, happy.
