Some people lie more than others. But all people lie… Lying by commission and lying by omission.
Facebook is nauseatingly full of lies and liars. You lie to your loved ones and you lie to yourself. You lie because it seems the kind thing to do, you lie because it is no big deal… but it is… to your inner self… and then you pay the price. This article explains how.
It’s obviously not my article… but it will do…
The Law of Honesty
Recognizing, accepting, and expressing our authentic interior reality lies at the heart of honesty; only when we are honest with ourselves can we speak or act honestly with anyone else. In the sense of integrity, honesty entails acting in line with higher laws despite negative impulses to the contrary.
Live according to your highest light and more light will be given. PEACE PILGRIM
Within the context of our life purpose, as we explore the bigger picture and meaning of our lives, the Law of Honesty points to higher laws and inner consequences that are instant, inevitable, and inescapable. It includes, but does not focus on, external codes of behavior.
The Law of Honesty centers around honesty with ourselves—our internal integrity. This law is useful for any of us, but especially so for those of us who tend to deceive themselves with rationalizations—those of us who have issues around honest expression or action. Seeing the truth and inevitable consequences of this law can help us turn our life around.
This law speaks to a larger drama being played out—one in which we cannot truly deceive anyone but ourselves. If we ever allow impulses of envy, greed, or manipulation to determine our actions or influence our expression, the consequences of these actions are already built into the mechanics of the universe and of our own psyche.
Those of us working with issues of integrity on our life path may tend, at times, to ignore or bend higher laws in the sense of not living up to our inner light. At times we can be like the child who furtively takes a candy bar and pockets it, thinking and hoping it will turn out okay, while the child’s mother watches from the end of the aisle.
We don’t need to be punished for breaking spiritual law or higher laws; the act itself is the “punishment’ and sets into motion subtle forces whose natural consequences we cannot escape any more than we can escape the force of gravity.
Those of us who slip into lower levels of integrity often don’t realize we’re doing it. We must lie to ourselves before we can lie to others. When we speak with “forked tongues” or mixed motives, we are not yet integrated. We have to achieve such integration in order to speak with integrity; we can’t have a part of us meaning one thing and another part meaning another. The
first step in honesty entails reconciling our own conflicting parts so we can say what we mean and mean what we say (see the exercise on pp. 339-40 under the Law of Responsibility).
When our internal parts work together; when we stop lying to ourselves or deceiving others; when we know deep down that we’re acting with integrity despite impulses to do otherwise, we feel gates of higher energy and inspiration open inside of us.
When we speak or act dishonestly, these gates shut; this is not a punishment, but simply the way our psyche works. The saying “Cheaters never prosper” always applies in the long run, because cheaters own psyches will not let them have inner peace no matter how rewarding their external circumstances may appear to be. Self-sabotage, down the line, is built into every dishonest act—even if we only deceive ourselves.
Some of us imagine that we are getting away with little schemes, maneuvers, and frauds for years while justifying and rationalizing our actions, and then we wonder why our lives aren’t working out the way we had hoped. We may imagine that we are getting away with something because we don’t get caught, but we are caught every time, by ourselves. As the John Lennon song goes, “Instant karma’s gonna get you.”
To use an extreme example, when we read the newspapers and see millionaire drug pushers living a life of opulence, we may imagine that they are escaping punishment, but we have only to glance inside their psyches to see the internal consequences and causes of their behavior. “Bad” people don’t go to hell; they are already in hell; that’s why they act so badly.
When we are dishonest in any way, with ourselves or with others, intentionally or not, our internal parts fight one another and our inner sense of spirit or inspiration fades; we feel cut off and alone, and we attract whatever lessons we need to learn. Concepts of morality may change, but consequences are absolute.
Dishonesty tends to take on different forms, such as lying to ourselves and others or seeking money or power for their own sakes, at the inevitable cost of our self-respect. Some of us are used to making rules rather than following them; we forget or ignore our culture’s standards of honesty and integrity, bending rules to suit our own desires, turning our backs on the light within us. Whenever we cut corners for expediency, or whenever the ends seem to justify means, we may not always reap obvious external consequences, but we create inner turbulence that we cannot escape no matter where we go.
Others of us who tend toward tunnel vision may put on blinders of self-deception by insisting that “it will work out this time” without our doing anything different. This kind of dishonesty also forfeits a sense of energy and spirit.
For some of us with expression issues who tend to hint, connive, sigh,
whine, or wait for others to read our mind, the Law of Honesty points out that such indirect, misleading, manipulative, or deceitful communication results when we let fear stop us from expressing our true feelings and needs. Whether our actions are deliberate or simply chronic habits, if we manipulate people with an angry face, a sad look, or a sigh, expecting others to “know how we feel” without actually stating it directly; if we tell people what we think they want to hear, even with the “best” intentions; or if we use words strategically, hooking into guilt or pushing vulnerable spots to control others or get -what we want, we may get what we want for the time being, but forfeit the inner light that we most need in the long run.
One should strive not to lie in the negative sense by remaining silent LEO TOLSTOY
Once we find the courage and wisdom simply to state our feelings and say what we want or need, this honesty can bring new life to stale or painful relationships.
Acting with the highest integrity and expressing our authentic needs and feelings can change our personal and professional relationships for the better. Such integrity, honesty, and truthfulness—or the lack of it—form the trail we leave behind us, our personal mark in history. Applying this law, our life changes in simple but profound ways we might not have believed possible, and the very goals we once schemed to achieve begin to manifest in ways we would not have dreamed.
The following exercises can help you achieve alignment with the Law of Honesty through direct experience and application.
Experiencing Honesty
1. Recall a time you showed high integrity in any area of life: Admitting a mistake Paying a debt Expressing what you really felt or needed Making good on a promise
2. How did it feel?
3. Also recall a time you or others felt you acted or spoke dishonestly. How do you feel about this? How might you now act differently in a similar situation?
Applying the Law of Honesty
1. Can you remember one or two instances in the past when you spoke or acted with less than complete honesty? Did you have a dispute over money or fail to make good on a debt?
Did you hide information to protect yourself in the guise of sparing someone else’s feelings? Did you say something you didn’t really mean?
2. Consider how it would feel to make a call, write a letter, send a check, ask forgiveness, and clean up old business. Follow through if this feels appropriate.
Me, myself, I am most interested in your truthfulness and your integrity with yourself. I consider it a more important integrity than being on time, or doing things without cutting corners… but that is me…
I have been in the integrity business for a long time. So long than when things don’t go well, or when I don’t feel well, the first thing I ask myself: Where is my integrity out? I always find it within a minute… And as soon as I restore my integrity, things start to go well, and I get well.
The difference between you and me, and it’s an important difference, is that I spent thousands of hours getting clear about what I am and who I am, so I can be true to myself, to my values, to my principles.
My experience is that you have no idea who you are, and you have no idea what integrity would be for you… Some of this work can be done in Reclaim… so you can start the work of getting clear… If you value your life.
