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I have to admit, I would have never thought to write this article, without reading Andy Shaw’s book, Creating a Bug Free Mind. He writes extensively about worry.
I never thought of myself as a worrier, but, of course, I still worry from time to time. Nowhere near as much as others.
They call it fear of failure, anxiety, but it is all worry.
Spending all your mental energy fretting about something in the future, while in the present things don’t get done. Hm. Really stupid, isn’t it?
And even if you are good at multitasking, and do something in the present, it only has half of your attention, so your results are going to be bad, poor… or none.
Now it even sounds stupider, doesn’t it?
I know people who don’t pay their bills, only worry about them. it must feel like they are really working, but the bills still not get paid!
But the biggest issue with worry, as I can see, is that it acts like a filter, a filter that says: ‘Impossible, why bother, never going to happen‘ about good things, and ‘Certain that it will happen‘ about bad things.
And guess what? This kind of filter actually becomes instrumental in making that thing happen the way the worry says. It brings it about.
Landmark calls this ‘being a clearing for‘… like a projection screen… reality making.
I have been experimenting with this for years now: when I change my attitude from doubt to certainty, from worry to certainty, I can blink, and reality seems to change.
I’ve tested this with things that are unlikely to actually change without me doing something, like the cards in Freecell.
I see the board, and it looks absolutely impossible to even take another step.
I feel fear welling up in my chest (yeah, it’s normal. Our survival machine considers everything a matter of life or death on every level of the vibrational scale! So even though my vibration is high, I have a survival machine that talks. My attitude toward that fear is allowing. I make room for the fear. I say ‘no big deal, not a guidance‘.)
Then I say to myself (attitude is created with words, words of declaration, not ordinary words) ‘No matter what, I’ll see to it that this game works out‘
The attitude is, the attitude I am taking on is that I will cause it to work, no matter how it looks now. If it is to be, it is up to me.
And then I open my eyes and look at the board, and the cards have changed… virtually… to me. And then the game becomes winnable. And my mood is: Hell yeah!
So, the opposite of worry is not ‘not worry’ it is more like ‘certainty’.
Certainty that whatever you will do will either succeed or fail, win or lose, and both success and failure are OK.
Which means to me that I reach the being of ‘there is nothing wrong, nothing to fix‘. This includes the exact result. Win or fail, both are OK.
The ‘nothing to fix‘ avatar state activator is a good tool to help you bring that about. Help you, I said, not do it for you. Do it with you.
And between you and me, until and unless you accomplish that, nothing and no one can help you live a life that is worth a damn, that is worth living. Because the foundation of that life is that you are wrong, or it is wrong, or they are wrong…
And no wrong can be fixed, because wrong is not real.
Einstein said that no problem has a solution if the problem is not real.
Wrong is not real.
good work, K, especially this last bit: you are not here to impress anyone. Congratulations.
I am reading A Bug Free Life now and I had to read the chapter on worry twice because I read too quickly through it the first time. Acceptance is what I am working on as it regards worry. When I worry I get obsessed with the issue and I develop a plan A, B, and C then I tweak it later when the issue doesn’t seem to be going my way. Now I am learning to be okay with the plan A (the best plan I can make at the time) and if it doesn’t work out quite the way I thought it would I just accept it and correct it (if I can or need to). It felt strange to not obsess, but the outcome was much more rewarding. I can focus on other things. So far I have only had to use it for issues that I can easily correct, but I see the value in making a decision, not obsessing, and making mistakes that I can learn from and apply to other issues. Oh, one more thing that this chapter helped me with is not being afraid to let people know that I don’t understand something. I worried that people would think I was stupid or inferior for asking. I realize that people are going to think whatever they want about me–some good things and some bad things–I don’t need to worry about what they think. I am not here to impress anyone. That’s not my purpose.
Kathryn, what you are saying is so important, I wrote a whole article about it. Thank you, thank you, thank you
When I read this article I realized that all my life I have only taken on things that I had a high percentage chance of winning. If I saw I had a high percentage chance of losing, I wouldn’t even consider doing it, no matter how much fun it could have been. Even with the adventurous things I’ve done, I had a higher chance of winning than losing. I thought I was so smart for being that way and I was so entrenched in it that if someone had tried to point out that it wasn’t so smart, I wouldn’t be able to see it.
Today, reading this article, it dawned on me that the truth is that I’ve been keeping myself in prison by refusing to consider doing things that have a high chance of losing. So many things I’ve missed out on.
I want that “Certainty that whatever you will do will either succeed or fail, win or lose, and both are OK.” When I have that, there will be no more prison.
I got the Nothing to Fix activator this morning and have been playing it all day – maybe that’s what made me able to see the truth of what I’ve been doing to myself.